


These Wonderful Things

by courtingstars (FallingSilver)



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Asexuality, Bisexuality, Boys Kissing, Canon Compliant, Christmas, Christmas Eve, Christmas Fluff, Christmas Presents, Christmas in Japan, Friendship/Love, Future Fic, M/M, Making Out, Mild Sexual Tension, Multi, Near Future, Romantic Fluff, lots of feelings, post last game
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2018-12-31
Packaged: 2019-09-27 12:14:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 27,915
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17161796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FallingSilver/pseuds/courtingstars
Summary: “So what are your all plans for the big night, huh?” Kise eyed the three of them, and waggled his well-shaped brows. “With yourlovers, I mean.”It’s Christmas Eve, the most popular date night of the year in Japan. Kuroko is going to Disneyland with Kagami. Akashi has a very special plan in mind for his date with Furihata, but he won’t tell anyone what it is. Kise has no plans at all, but ends up at a certain former captain’s apartment anyway. Aomine and Momoi spend a friendly night in, as usual, and Murasakibara is bribed with cake.Meanwhile Midorima is telling anyone who will listen (and also those who won’t) that he does not have romantic plans of any kind, whatsoever, even though Takao did ask to see him butit does not mean that, no, absolutely not.(The chapters for KagaKuro, AkaFuri, and KiKasa are up! The rest will be posted soon.)





	1. Just Holding Your Hand

**Author's Note:**

> Merry Christmas, everyone! Two years ago, I wrote a Christmas genfic about the Generation of Miracles called [The Yuletide Bright](https://archiveofourown.org/works/7605655/chapters/17310241), which is a bunch of holiday friendship fluff and was one of my favorites to write. In that story, they all briefly talked about their plans for Christmas Eve. (Which in Japan is considered a super romantic night, where couples go on dates, and look at special holiday lights together and so on.) This fic is about how those plans turned out! It takes place in their third year of high school, and fits in with the canon timeline, post Last Game. Each chapter features a different pairing/friendship (some of them are in relationships, some of the pairings are more implied). Each one is also heavily inspired by a lyric from the Christmas carol "Sleigh Ride." I'm planning to post the rest of the chapters over the course of the week.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Today's chapter is KagaKuro. Enjoy! If you'd like some very thematically appropriate (and adorably cheesy, haha) music, [here's a Disney singalong version](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=022oKSDhDH4) of Sleigh Ride. (Which is how I learned the song as a kid!) And if you'd like to read some cultural notes about some of the details in this chapter, please check [my Tumblr](http://courtingstars.tumblr.com/post/181416901682/notes-for-just-holding-your-hand-kagakuro).

_“These wonderful things are the things we will remember all through our lives.”_

* * *

Kuroko hummed softly, as he leaned toward the bathroom mirror. He couldn’t remember any of the song’s lyrics. They were in English, and though he wanted to master that particular language as soon as possible, it was still difficult to memorize words that sounded so foreign.

He knew the song was about winter weather, and holidays. Something about sleigh rides, he thought.

The brisk melody bounced along, while Kuroko skimmed a comb through his hair. Until he was forced to try using his fingers instead—with less-than-perfect results.

Usually, Kuroko never fussed in front of a mirror. There wasn’t much of a point, when so few people noticed him in the first place. When he explained this once to some of his friends, they gave him looks he didn’t quite understand… As though he had just told them something upsetting.

For his part, Kuroko didn’t mind. He couldn’t imagine what it was like, to have people actually pay attention to how you looked. It was nice that he didn’t have to care so much about that.

Except, well… He _had_ started to care, lately. A little more than before.

He frowned, studying his reflection. His hair constantly resisted any attempt to style it. No matter which way he brushed, the downy locks tended to settle into the same messy pattern. Having shorter hair helped, but it was growing out again—and when he mentioned getting another haircut, the reactions were mixed, at best.

(“Aw but I miss your old hair, Tetsu-kun! It was so cute!” “Only if you come to my salon this time, Kurokocchi. ’Cause like your last few haircuts were fine and stuff, but… They weren’t super fashionable, to be honest?” “Meh. Do whatever. But it was fine before.” “Yeah, Kurochin’s hair is better long. And fluffy. So I can fluff it lots.”)

Then there was the response that kept playing over and over inside Kuroko’s head. After he finally gave up, and asked the person who was the only reason he started to care about things like this in the first place…

_“It looks good both ways, dude. I mean, um, yeah… Honestly, you looked pretty hot.”_

Which was aggravating, because Kuroko was blushing far too furiously at the time to try to ask which haircut was the hot one, or if Kagami maybe meant both—or if his boyfriend was just trying to say he thought Kuroko looked good no matter what, or some other unbearably nice thing.

In any case, there was nothing to be done about it now. So Kuroko surrendered, putting away the comb, and headed back to his bedroom. A small pile of clothes was heaped on his bed. He began the slow, methodical process of layering them over the shirt and jeans he was already wearing.

The weather was supposed to be unusually cold. Which meant Kuroko had no choice but to bundle up, or he’d be shivering uncontrollably for the entire day. He sighed, wishing he weren’t quite so sensitive to the weather. A glance in the mirror reminded him that all these layers weren’t exactly the most flattering outfit, either. With the heavy coat, two sweaters, thick scarf, and oversized hat, he bore a striking resemblance to a schoolchild on a snow day off from school.

Not that it should matter, really. Kagami wasn’t the type to notice what anyone was wearing, Kuroko included. And as far as he could tell, Kuroko didn’t have any reason to worry about his boyfriend finding him attractive. Still, it seemed like it would be nice to be able to dress up a bit more, and go without some layers.

It was definitely a bad idea, though. Kuroko could already imagine himself turning blue after an hour, and Kagami overreacting and taking him home.

Kagami, meanwhile, always ran warm. Kuroko had discovered some time ago that his boyfriend made an excellent source of heat in a pinch. Come to think of it, if he wore fewer layers, Kuroko would have a perfect excuse to sidle up to Kagami, and snuggle underneath his jacket. He could insist on staying that close to him, perhaps even for the entire night…

Kuroko blinked. He wasn’t sure where that idea came from. It was rather devious. And not just because he enjoyed having an excuse to cuddle up against his muscular, handsome boyfriend… Kuroko was fairly certain an arrangement like that would risk making Kagami uncomfortable. (As in, uncomfortably excited.)

He cast the idea aside. It seemed a bit cruel, or at least inconsiderate. Especially since they were going to be out in public. In Japan, even innocent displays of affection could be frowned upon. Anything more than a held hand or the lightest kiss certainly was.

Kuroko left his house a few minutes early, in all the layers he originally chose. It was better to keep as warm as he could, he decided. He wanted to make absolutely sure that nothing interrupted their evening together.

As he hurried to where he was meeting Kagami, Kuroko noticed a jittery, fluttering sensation, deep in his stomach. With each step, the fluttering steadily increased. Kuroko wasn’t sure he had felt this much anticipation since he’d played a championship game in basketball. (Which was quite some time ago, at this point.)

It made sense for him to be excited. He rarely got to spend time with Kagami in person, now that he was pursuing a career in the NBA over in California. But Kuroko didn’t understand why he felt almost _nervous_.

They had been dating officially for over nine months now. More importantly, they had been partners for two and a half years. Even when Kagami moved back to America, they remained close, and talked online every day. Not to mention that before Kagami left Seirin, they had kissed on occasion, and even made out. (Which was something of a mess, actually, because it took an embarrassing amount of time for them to realize they both still wanted more. Even if it meant a long-distance relationship.)

The point was, Kuroko knew Kagami very well, and had known him for a while. He was used to spending time with him. They were a couple, but good friends, too. So it really didn’t make sense for Kuroko to feel almost anxious, as though this day was unusually significant, somehow.

True, they were finally going on another date, one he was looking forward to for months, but… It was still just Kagami-kun. The light to Kuroko’s shadow. The one person who had always given him the most hope. Who helped him remember how to believe in himself again, and believe in all of his friends as well.

All right, so perhaps the intensity of his anticipation did make a little bit of sense.

Kuroko was nearing a certain street corner, one that reminded him strongly of all of his shared history with Kagami. He was walking slower than before, trying to stop the wind from biting so sharply at his face. It was cold enough that he had already pushed his scarf up past his nose.

Overhead, the winter sky was thick with clouds. In the ice-gray weather, the tall buildings of Tokyo looked dull and lifeless. A week ago, it would have made Kuroko feel rather dull and gray himself.

But as he reached the corner, and saw who was already waiting there, it was like every part of him had kindled to life.

Kagami Taiga was standing beside the curb, all six and a half feet of him. (In some ways, it annoyed Kuroko that his boyfriend was even  _taller_ now.) He was dressed the way he usually did in the winter, in a dark jacket and a plain black t-shirt. The jacket was unzipped, as if he didn’t even notice the cold.

He looked, well… gorgeous.

Kuroko had found Kagami attractive from the start. But when they first met, they were both awkward teenagers. Kagami in particular was gruff and a bit immature, and still growing into himself.

Now at eighteen, he was essentially an adult, and even more physically fit than ever. He had the type of strong, chiseled body that always showed, even when his hyper-toned muscles were covered up. His facial features had matured too, settling into a fierce but powerful look. All in all, he had the appearance of a young man entering adulthood—who also happened to be impossibly cut.

In many ways, Kuroko felt like he was practically dating an NBA player already. True, Kagami wasn’t playing professionally yet… “Yet” being the key word, given how many American colleges had begged to recruit him. But with his tall build and casual confidence, Kagami already looked like a celebrity athlete. Especially in Japan, where he stood out even more than he must have in America.

Kuroko couldn’t help staring, even though he’d just seen Kagami the previous day. While he was doing this, he noticed how Kagami was shifting his feet, in a restless manner. His dark red eyes were darting around, scanning his surroundings.

Kagami was looking for him, Kuroko realized at once.

Kuroko couldn’t explain why this fact made him feel strangely, well… _real_. As though there was some deeper truth to the idea that he was just a shadow, and Kagami’s light, his presence, was the force that made it possible for him to materialize all the way. And without that fiery presence, Kuroko was never quite all of himself.

It was a feeling Kuroko tried not to contemplate too often. Because the implications were concerning, at best.

Maybe this was why, when he saw Kagami looking around, Kuroko focused on a sudden temptation to tease him. For some reason, he had the oddest urge to see how long he could stand beside his boyfriend without attracting his notice. Or he could sneak up behind Kagami and stay there, shifting whenever he did. Maybe even until Kagami tried to call him, and ask where he was.

Kuroko couldn’t explain why that idea made him feel secretly giddy. The truth was, Kagami always had this effect on him, for whatever reason. Kuroko genuinely wanted to get Kagami’s attention. He wanted to tease him, to a degree that he rarely did with other people. To do things that were calculated, in a silly sort of way, just to make him react.

But that was childish, Kuroko reminded himself, and very immature. (Normally, these weren’t things he needed to remind himself.) So he did his best to resist the temptation.

Still, he allowed himself to wait until he was actually standing next to his boyfriend, before he said, “Good afternoon, Kagami-kun.”

Kagami jumped, of course. (And Kuroko felt that small spark of glee, like always.) He seemed even more startled than Kuroko had expected. Then he just looked annoyed. “Seriously, how the hell do you do that? I was _looking_ for you.”

“Yes, I noticed.” Kuroko couldn’t hold back a smile. He made sure to say, in a sincere tone, “I’m sorry to have kept you waiting. I didn’t expect you’d already be here.”

“Yeah, well…” Kagami looked embarrassed, but the corner of his mouth crooked upward. “Couldn’t wait.”

Kuroko felt a familiar, too-hard thump of his heart. A part of him almost missed the days when Kagami was just his partner, who hadn’t confessed to him yet… Once they started dating, Kagami somehow became even more charming than before. Perhaps because he was more open with—or more aware of—his feelings. Either way, it had a tendency to do odd things to Kuroko’s insides.

He hoped he wasn’t blushing, at least. “Did you have a nice time with Himuro-san?”

“Uh-huh. It was cool. But he had to run off to practice.” Kagami gave a slight shrug. Himuro was attending a Tokyo university that specialized in sports training, and their practice schedule was particularly rigorous. “So, you ready to catch the train?”

Kuroko nodded, excited at the reminder of where they were going. They had started walking, when Kagami leaned over and grabbed his hand. Kuroko looked up at him.

“That was quick,” he murmured. Kagami’s bare fingers felt warm, even through Kuroko’s thick gloves. “Our date hasn’t even started yet, technically speaking.”

“Yeah, well, I’ll just lose track of you if I don’t.” Kagami’s voice was gruff. “Come on, shadow.”

Another smile tingled on Kuroko’s lips. And something deep inside him whispered a feather-soft, _“Yes,”_ in reply.

They caught a train to Tokyo Station, then switched to another line. Even though they were holding hands most of the way, they didn’t get a single disapproving look. Kuroko knew why. People certainly stared at Kagami, at the muscular young man with dark red hair who towered over the Saturday crowds. Next to him, though, Kuroko was utterly invisible.

He didn’t mind at all. Especially if it meant he could hold Kagami’s hand to his heart’s content.

It was wonderful, to finally have Kagami beside him again. Kuroko was basking in the feeling like it was sunshine. They texted every day, and had video calls multiple times a week. None of it compared to having Kagami physically there with him, to the solid, constant warmth of his presence. He had been in Japan for several days already, but Kuroko still couldn’t get enough of it.

The two of them were standing together in a corner beside the train door. Kuroko found himself inching closer and closer to Kagami’s side, like he was caught in some invisible gravitational force. Before long, he was snuggled up against him. Kagami twitched a little at the contact, and Kuroko chuckled silently to himself.

“Thought our date hadn’t started,” Kagami muttered.

Kuroko peered up at him. “I believe you were the one who began this, Kagami-kun.”

He tugged on Kagami’s jacket, so that Kagami hunched forward on reflex. Which was when Kuroko went up on his toes and gave him a quick, phantom-like kiss.

Kuroko had to admit, he liked how a single kiss from him could make Kagami blush, almost as red as his hair.

Kagami still looked rather flushed when they arrived at their stop. The station was extremely crowded, filled with people bustling to and fro across the platform. Many were carrying large shopping bags, or had children with them. There were plenty of couples, as well. Which was no surprise, since this was the stop for Tokyo Disneyland.

Kuroko had always wanted to come to Disneyland on Christmas Eve. He went to the park many times as a child, and those visits were some of his most treasured memories. So he thought it would be nice to go there during the holidays, with a significant other. The park was a popular place to bring a date, after all.

When Kagami said he would be in Japan during Christmas, Kuroko was ready to suggest it. But before he could, Kagami said there was somewhere he really wanted to take him. Kuroko let him explain his date idea first. And funnily enough, Kagami suggested Disneyland. Apparently, this was something that Kagami had dreamed about doing as well. Not on Christmas, necessarily, but in general.

“And I kind of figured it’d be the one here in California,” he had admitted. “But it’s basically the same, right?”

Kuroko had wholeheartedly agreed. He still sometimes wondered how even though the two of them were so different, they seemed to have many of the same dreams.

They waited in the long line in front of the entrance. It was still afternoon, but the clouds were so thick that there was hardly any sunlight. It wasn’t too cold yet, though. And Kuroko had all the fiery light he needed, right next to him.

They weren’t holding hands anymore, for the moment. Kagami had said something about how his palms were sweaty. (Kuroko noticed, but he hadn’t minded.) It was somewhat odd, however… Kuroko kept getting the impression that Kagami was slightly on edge. Like he was nervous about something.

Kuroko couldn’t imagine why that would be. For his part, he was indeed excited, anxious from sheer anticipation. But he wasn’t the type of nervous that involved any genuine worry. He asked about it, but Kagami said it was nothing.

As they entered the park, Kuroko and Kagami stopped to admire all the holiday decorations. The World Bazaar was draped with garlands studded with colorful ornaments, and a truly gigantic Christmas tree towered in the center. They slowly made their way through the masses of people.

“So, what’re we doing first?” Kagami said. He had grabbed onto Kuroko’s elbow. Kuroko supposed that was a wise idea, in a crowd like this one.

He smiled up at Kagami, who smiled right back. “How about everything?”

They certainly gave it their best attempt. They managed to dodge the throngs of people gathering for the first parade, and went on a few rides. Since the lines were so long, they took a break to admire all the Christmas trees around the park. Kuroko was looking forward to when the sun would set, and the lights would switch on.

They watched one of the shows, and saw part of the second parade. After that, they decided to go shopping, but Kuroko was the only one who purchased anything. He bought some cookies for his parents and grandmother. And when Kagami wasn’t looking, he picked out a headband with orange and black striped ears, that was supposed to represent the character Tigger. Which he then placed on his boyfriend’s head, after pretending that he was just trying to sneak another kiss.

“It’s appropriate, isn’t it?” he said. “And it’s what you get, for not wearing a hat.”

Kagami gave him a look of chagrin. But he didn’t remove the ears, much to Kuroko’s satisfaction.

They stopped for a quick meal, around the time the sun was beginning to set. While they were eating, they compared notes, about which rides they hadn’t been on yet, and which were their favorites. Kuroko also asked Kagami which rides he liked the most, at the Disneyland in California.

“Oh man, there are some great ones,” he said, with visible enthusiasm. “Indiana Jones is the best. Nothing else is close. And Space Mountain, but they have that here, kind of. Oh yeah, and the Matterhorn was the first coaster I went on. It’s pretty good. Plus there’s this goofy snowman monster.”

“A snowman monster?” Kuroko was imagining some sort of angry Frosty-the-Snowman type character. But he was pretty sure he must be mistaken.

“Yup.” Kagami had a cheerful look on his face, that was really quite amusing with the tiger ears. “You’ll have to come check it out sometime.”

“Yes,” Kuroko said, without really thinking about it. A few minutes later, he excused himself to use the restroom. While he was washing his hands, he found himself getting lost in thought.

He certainly wanted to visit the Disneyland in California, someday. But he wasn’t sure when, or if, that would happen. Kagami had suggested, more than once, that Kuroko should come visit him in America sometime. The only trouble was, going overseas was expensive. Not to mention Kuroko had never been out of the country before. He didn’t even have a passport, technically.

Still, it did sound appealing. Kuroko couldn’t deny that he had been thinking about it more and more, lately. Especially on dull nights when Kagami was too busy to call, and Kuroko would just lie awake staring at the ceiling, and count the days until they were both on vacation again.

He was trying to put all of this out of his mind, however. Mostly because of a brief conversation he had, just a few nights ago. With a certain someone who was usually too right for his own good, who told Kuroko that he would move to America soon.

Kuroko had absolutely no intention of doing that, not yet. He would be going to a Japanese university next year. He would work very hard to improve his English, so he could finish his graduate studies overseas, if he wanted. He would keep playing basketball, if at all possible. And then… Then, he would see.

Kuroko headed outside. It was dark now, and all the lights in the park were sparking to life. The famous blue-capped towers of Cinderella Castle shone in the distance, and all the holiday displays were twinkling with galaxies of red, white, and green bulbs. As he slipped through the milling crowds, Kuroko soon caught sight of a tall, red-haired head, one that loomed above all the rest.

Kagami was hovering beside a railing, glancing around. He looked completely at home, in the midst of all this colorful brilliance. It was almost though he did glow with his own light, somehow. Perhaps because he stood out in the crowd, like a bulb in the darkness. Kuroko didn’t know why, because they’d been together all day… But just seeing his boyfriend standing there, looking like his usual radiant self, made his heart skip.

Without any warning, Kuroko suddenly thought that if Kagami asked him to, maybe it wouldn’t be so absurd for him to move to California. Then they could be together all the time. And he could see Kagami looking like that, every day, and not just through a computer screen.

It wasn’t too late, in theory, to apply to an American university instead…

 _Kuroko Tetsuya,_ said a scolding voice inside his brain. It almost sounded a bit like his grandmother. Though that didn’t make much sense, because he had never given her any reason to say something like this. _You are not running off to another country to be with a boy. If you go to America, you’ll get there on your own, at your own pace—and not just because a very handsome young man would like you to be there with him._

Kuroko took a breath, and shook his head. He really needed to come back to his senses. There was no reason for him to think something like that… He and Kagami hadn’t even been dating for a year. Yes, Kagami had changed his life, and Kuroko treasured their relationship, more than he ever realized he would.

But it wasn’t that serious already. It couldn’t be.

Still, when he snuck up to Kagami’s side, Kuroko found himself slipping his hand right into Kagami’s much larger one. Feeling oddly impatient, just for that simple touch. As though he suddenly needed the warmth of it, the closeness of Kagami’s presence.

Kagami, of course, almost jumped out of his skin. Kuroko somehow managed to keep ahold of his hand, though. “Dude, what the hell?”

“I’m sorry,” Kuroko said quietly, as he gave Kagami’s large, warm fingers a squeeze. “Thank you for waiting.”

Kagami gazed down at him, a question blazing in his bright eyes. Kuroko wasn’t sure what it would be. But before he could ask, Kuroko broke the silence, with the suggestion that they get in line for another ride.

Kagami blinked, then said, “Uh, yeah. Sure.”

They were soon in line, still holding hands. Kuroko had forgotten to put his gloves back on after dinner. Which meant that he and Kagami were now clasping their bare hands together, skin against skin, for the first time that night. Kuroko couldn’t explain why right now that simple contact—a gesture they’d shared many times in the past—was making him tingle all over.

It felt wonderful. Just that, by itself.

Halfway through the line, he and Kagami had lapsed into silence. They exchanged a look, an unusually long one. And for some reason, the expression on Kagami’s face made Kuroko feel as though they were suddenly in a world of their own.

Kagami’s hand was sweating a little again, Kuroko noticed. The strange thing was, his palm was starting to get a bit sweaty in its own right. For the first time that day, he was feeling uncomfortably warm. Which was odd, because the air around them had only gotten colder. And he still wasn’t wearing his gloves.

Kuroko had a sudden urge to pull Kagami into a kiss. And not a light kiss, either. Which wasn’t appropriate at all, in a setting like this one. He tried to think about something else. But every time he looked back at Kagami, he felt the urge strike again, like a tiny flame flickering inside him.

He started to wonder what Kagami would want to do, after Disneyland closed. The park closed fairly early, and most couples made plans for afterward. If Kagami still lived in Japan, they would have gone to his apartment. And then, well… Kuroko had a few thoughts about what he would have liked to do, in that case. Kagami didn’t have his apartment anymore, though. So that wasn’t an option.

Of course, there was always Kagami’s hotel room. And there were other types of hotel rooms, too, that couples often rented on Christmas Eve…

Kuroko shook his head again. _Kuroko Tetsuya, get your mind out of the gutter._

He didn’t know what was wrong with him. Not that the idea itself was wrong… Both he and Kagami were of age. But at the same time, they were still in high school. There was really no reason to rush, when it came to that sort of thing.

Besides, that wasn’t what this particular night was supposed to be about. It was just supposed to be a fun, simple date. Wasn’t it?

Kuroko didn’t know why it kept feeling far more serious than that.

* * *

Kagami Taiga was trying to figure out why in the hell he was so damn nervous.

Okay, so he had a decent reason to be nervous… Except no, he really didn’t. Because that stupid detail was his fault in the first place, and besides, he wasn’t supposed to be thinking about it right now. He was at Disneyland with his boyfriend, and they were having a great time. And they were together, which was what mattered, way more than anything else.

So it was unbelievably annoying that he couldn't stop thinking about the dumb envelope in his pocket, and what might happen when he gave it to Kuroko.

Kagami did his best to put it out of his mind. And he kind of succeeded, for the most part. The weird thing was, he still felt really nervous. And if it wasn’t about the gift, then what was it about, anyway?

He reminded himself that he could always chicken out. Kuroko didn’t even know about the envelope, or what was in it. And he never had to know. So hey, if Kagami had to pretend that he wasn’t going through with the whole thing just to get it off his mind, then he would. Enjoying his time with Kuroko was way more important.

So he did. But yeah, he was still weirdly jittery.

Seriously, what was up with that?

Kagami had wanted to take Kuroko to Disneyland for forever. He was daydreaming about it almost as soon as he started thinking about making his whole, “Hey so I really like you, like a lot, maybe too much, and yeah it’s definitely like _that_ so can we maybe actually date now even though I live in America?” confession. In a way, he had been thinking about it for longer, since he was like eleven. As soon as Kagami realized he was into guys, he liked to imagine how great it would be to take a boyfriend to Disneyland someday.

Now he was finally doing it, and yeah, it was awesome. But it wasn’t like it was _complicated_ , or something. There wasn’t supposed to be any actual pressure involved.

Kagami didn’t get why, with Kuroko, it kind of felt like there was.

Not for Kuroko, though, apparently. He seemed totally easygoing today. He had shown up looking like his usual calm, straight-faced self. He was talking to Kagami like he always did, flirting a little but not too much, and just generally making the whole thing seem so damn _natural_.

Kagami didn’t know how Kuroko was always so good at playing it cool. Or maybe he just wasn't nervous in the first place.

Meanwhile Kagami didn’t feel like he had it together, like, at all. From the second Kuroko first showed up that afternoon—materializing out of nowhere, as usual—Kagami’s heart felt like it had stopped working right. Because dammit, how did Kuroko have any business looking that _cute_?

Seriously, no dude was supposed to be able to pull off being bundled up from head to toe, and still look like the world’s most adorable boyfriend. But Kuroko did it, somehow. Even during the walk to the train, when Kuroko had his scarf pulled up past his nose, he kept looking up at Kagami with those big, crystal-blue eyes of his. And suddenly Kagami would get the most random urge to tug that scarf down and kiss his boyfriend, all over his weirdly pretty face.

So yeah, that was kind of a problem.

The feeling wasn’t letting up either. It was nighttime now, and they were in another line, and somehow Kagami was feeling that urge more than ever. Maybe because they were holding hands again. Kuroko’s hand was bare this time, and something about the mingling warmth of their skin was shooting an electric charge straight through Kagami’s veins.

He was trying not to think about it. Like, really trying. Because they were smack in the middle of Tokyo Disneyland. And okay, sometimes Kagami forgot certain parts of what Japanese culture was like… But he knew kissing in public was one of those weird semi-taboos. Where you could maybe get away with it, if you didn’t care what people thought, and it was just for a second? But even then, some people might glare at you, or give you the side-eye. You definitely couldn’t get too carried away.

And Kagami wasn’t that confident in his ability to not get carried away, right now.

Meanwhile, back at the Disneyland in California, some couples would straight up make out in the lines, in front of everyone. Like seriously, Kagami had seen more than a few teenagers and twenty-somethings with their hands down each other’s back pockets and their tongues out. (Which was pretty ridiculous, like come on dudes, save some for later? Plus there were a bunch of little kids around. Jesus.)

Kagami didn’t want to do that. Not exactly. But now that they were in line, he kind of couldn’t stop thinking about the idea.

Which was probably why his hand was sweating again. So that was… cool.

It was nice that they could hold hands, though. No one else seemed to be paying attention to that at all. Kagami thought they might get a few weird looks, especially since they were both guys. But nope. Maybe because nobody was noticing Kuroko in the first place. Which made Kagami feel sort of tempted to figure out how far that went, and if he could get away with kissing Kuroko in public, too…

Except that didn’t make any sense. It wasn’t like people were going to look over and see Kagami kissing the damn air. Right?

Okay, to be honest, Kagami still had no idea how it all worked. Kuroko’s invisible thing was just weird like that.

Anyway, the point was, Kagami needed to chill out. They could kiss and stuff later. In private, where it was fine for sure. Which was why Kagami kept trying to ignore how every time Kuroko looked over at him, his heart would start pounding again, and his gut would curl up in knots.

He was kind of shocked when they were suddenly at the front of the line. Which quickly gave way to a feeling of resignation, because oh right, Kuroko had wanted to go on It’s A Small World. Which meant Kagami had to listen to that song for fifteen minutes straight. Kuroko seemed to think it was hilarious, to the point that he started humming it when they got off the ride, too. At which point Kagami pulled Kuroko’s hat down all the way over his eyes and told him to knock it off.

Kuroko just laughed, and took off his hat so he could put it back on straight. And he looked so ridiculously cute, with that fluffy hair of his sticking up all over the place, that Kagami kind of couldn’t handle it.

Which was probably why he didn’t put up enough of a fight, when Kuroko asked to go on the only ride in the whole park that Kagami really did not want to go on.

“Are you saying that you’re genuinely scared of it, Kagami-kun?” Kuroko seemed to be fighting another urge to laugh.

“No! I’m not. It’s just a dumb ride,” Kagami said, trying not to sputter. “It’s fine, I can do it. It’s not my thing, is all.”

“All right.” Kuroko’s mouth was twitching. “I was hoping to see the holiday decorations they added, but if you’d like, I can always ride it alone—”

“It’s fine! Whatever. Okay? We can do it.”

Which was how Kagami ended up going on the Haunted Mansion, his least favorite ride in history. He hated ghosts, and the ride had totally freaked him out, when he went on it as a little kid. And yeah, he was way older now, and it was just some goofy ride at Disneyland. But the memories still made him cringe. And no, it didn’t help that the ride was decked out for the holidays, with a Nightmare Before Christmas theme. “Spooky Christmas” was not Kagami’s idea of a good time.

So he was pretty on edge when they went through the first part of the ride, with the creepy-ass elevator in the dark. He could have sworn Kuroko was enjoying the whole situation, too… Maybe because Kagami kept grabbing him, mostly just to make sure he was still there. It was even harder to keep track of Kuroko in the darkness, in a crowd of people.

They were moving to the second part of the line, when Kagami lost sight of Kuroko completely. His heart was going way too fast, and he couldn’t see much of anything in the crowded, dimly lit hallway. He was trying to figure out if he should stop and wait, or keep moving with the crowd, or what… A couple seconds later, Kuroko was there again. He gently held onto Kagami’s wrist, while they waited to get on one of those two-seater “doom buggy” cars for the rest of the ride.

Kagami swallowed, hard. All this dumb creepy stuff was one thing. It didn’t bother him that much, really…

But the fact that he couldn’t seem to find Kuroko on his own did.

Maybe he was remembering it wrong. Kagami felt like before he moved back to America, he was getting pretty used to Kuroko’s whole “lack of presence” thing. Kuroko could still sneak up on him whenever he wanted, obviously. But Kagami thought like he was getting the hang of finding where his partner was, in normal situations. Like if they were walking side by side, he wouldn’t lose track of him. And he could sometimes find him in a crowd, if he looked long and hard enough.

But he couldn’t do that anymore. And it really bugged him.

Kagami had gone back to America because it felt like the right thing to do. Kuroko and all of his friends had found their love for basketball again. And competing with them had helped Kagami rediscover it too, along with his old dreams, about playing in the NBA. So he decided to go for those dreams, as soon as he could. To prove to the rest of them they could do the same, if they wanted. And because he had faith that they would keep moving forward, in whatever way was right for them.

The one thing he hated about it, though, was giving up Kuroko as a partner. Kuroko had told him to go, and it felt like it would be wrong not to, after that… Like Kagami would just be patronizing him, implying that Kuroko couldn’t get by on his own, or that their connection was somehow dependent on playing high school basketball together for another two years.

But Kagami still missed it. A lot. And it felt even worse, when he realized that spending all this time apart meant that he wasn’t as used to being around Kuroko anymore. Yeah, they were dating, so in some ways they were closer than ever, but… Some irrational part of Kagami felt like maybe their whole relationship could just slip away, like Kuroko could slip away in a crowd. Especially when there was all the distance of the Pacific Ocean between them.

Even now, when they were in the same place, it wasn’t like Kagami could find Kuroko on his own. Sometimes he really did seem like some kind of phantom. Like he could disappear, just like that, permanently out of reach.

Kagami didn’t want to think about that. So he tried to focus on the ride, once he and Kuroko were in their vehicle together. Except now he was remembering why he hated this stupid thing, with all the weird crooked hallways and skeletal portraits and glaring eyes in the wallpaper. He was clenching his teeth, when a small hand squeezed his arm, and he almost jumped straight out of the tiny car.

“Kagami-kun, are you all right?” Kuroko said, in that feathery voice of his.

“Yeah, fine. Great.” Kagami changed tactics, and focused on Kuroko instead. Because they were stuck in a moving vehicle, with a bar literally holding them in place. It wasn’t like Kuroko could just disappear in front of him.

So now they were staring at each other. Judging from Kuroko’s expression, he was trying really hard not to let on that he found Kagami’s fraying nerves funny. (Little jerk.) They had reached the ballroom part, which wasn’t as creepy, especially with the whole Christmas motif. And suddenly Kagami was weirdly aware of how close he and Kuroko were sitting. In the dark, in a partially closed vehicle, where people weren’t likely to see them.

Even in the shadows, Kuroko’s eyes reflected each subtle, passing light of the ride. It was almost hypnotizing, somehow… A slight movement made Kagami glance downward. Kuroko was pressing his lips together, softly. The ghostly lighting was turning his pale skin blue, almost like moonlight. His lips slowly parted.

Kagami couldn’t figure out which one of them actually started it. But all of a sudden, they were grabbing onto each other. Kagami's arms locked around Kuroko’s back, and Kuroko’s hands tangled in his hair, and their mouths crushed together, hard. Before long, they were kissing so fast they were barely pausing enough to breathe. Kuroko’s lips were as smooth and soft as always, and invitingly warm. And the nearness of him, the familiar pressure of his slender body wrapped up securely in Kagami’s arms, was enough to make Kagami feel giddy.

The car swiveled around, and the track sloped downward, so that the car was tipping back. And they were still kissing, somehow, and Kuroko’s hand was skimming down the front of Kagami’s t-shirt and Kagami growled a little, right beside Kuroko’s ear.

Then the car tipped up again, and there was Jack Skellington in a Santa Claus outfit, grinning at them and saying some weird festive crap. Which was weirdly jarring—and just like that, they weren’t kissing anymore. And oh, right, they were in the middle of a Disneyland ride, which wasn’t the smartest place to be making out, even if nobody saw you.

Kagami barely registered the rest of the huge graveyard scene, with all the ghosts and Christmas decorations, and spectral snowflakes flying everywhere. Then it was time for the famous “hitchhiking ghosts” part—and when the car swirled around to face the mirror, yeah, there was a ghost in their reflection with them.

But he and Kuroko were wide-eyed, and turning multiple shades of red. Kuroko’s hat was halfway off his head, and Kagami’s hair was, well, messed up. They were still sitting pretty close, so they quickly scooted apart.

They kind of stumbled off the ride after that. Kagami didn’t know about Kuroko, but he was trying his best not to look embarrassed. Or it would be even more obvious what they had just done.

And the whole time, he kept thinking, _What in the hell was **that**?_

Kagami hadn’t meant to start kissing Kuroko out of nowhere. Honestly, he should have been way too distracted by the dumb ride for something like that to happen. He still wasn’t sure which one of them had even made the first move.

Well, he was never going to think about that ride the same, ever again.

As they left the Haunted Mansion, they weren’t really looking at each other. Kagami cleared his throat. “So, um… That was… What’s next?”

There was a short little pause. Then Kuroko said, in the most normal, friendly voice in the world, “Well, I believe the fireworks are supposed to start soon.”

“Right. Yeah.” Kagami couldn’t tell if he was relieved, or kind of weirded out that Kuroko was acting like nothing had happened. “Sounds good. How about we find a place to watch?”

Kuroko agreed with a nod. They headed over toward Cinderella Castle. Tons of people were already gathering in the central part of the park, to watch the nightly firework show. Kagami and Kuroko tried to search for a place that was more out of the way, and not as crowded. While they were hunting, they were talking, just like normal. Or mostly, anyway. Kagami couldn’t shake a weird feeling of tension, but he was pretty sure it was just him.

They found a decent place on the far side of the castle, and settled in for the wait. Kagami was watching a little kid with a balloon tied to his wrist, and thinking in a joking way that he should do that to Kuroko, so he could use the balloon to track him. He was about to say this to his boyfriend, when he turned, and…

Kuroko wasn’t there.

Kagami glanced around. He was sure Kuroko was standing right beside him. He scanned the space near the railing they staked out, then the whole area around it. No phantom sixth man. Kagami turned around again, and again. He searched the crowds, trying to find that familiar but hard-to-notice face. Nothing.

“Kuroko? Hey! Kuroko!” he called out. He figured that would do it. Kuroko had to be nearby, and he just hadn't realized that his dumbass boyfriend had lost track of him again. Then he would appear out of nowhere, tap Kagami on the arm, and say in a teasing voice that he’d been there the whole time. And it would be embarrassing and dumb and no big deal.

Except that didn’t happen. Kuroko didn’t answer Kagami. Because he wasn’t there.

Kagami started walking in a tight circle, trying to see around the nearby bushes, past the crowds. His heart was starting to inch its way up his throat. What was he supposed to do, if Kuroko didn’t show up again? Could he have gotten lost or turned around, somehow? He knew his way around the park, though. Didn’t he…?

They hadn’t even picked a meeting place if they got separated, Kagami realized suddenly. God, he could have kicked himself. That was just incredibly dumb on his part, on a night as packed as Christmas Eve.

For now, the best thing he could do was stay put. Which was frustrating as hell.

He stood there for like fifteen minutes, getting more and more tense. Until he finally realized the most obvious thing in the whole damn world. Which was that he could try calling Kuroko. He fumbled for his phone, swearing under his breath.

The phone rang, and rang. Nobody answered. Kagami was about to try sending a message when he heard a soft, “Hello?” beside him.

Which… what? That didn’t even make sense. He turned, and there was Kuroko, smiling right at him.

“What the hell, dude?” Kagami sputtered. “Why didn’t you answer?”

“I’m sorry. I did feel my phone vibrating, but my hands were full.” Kuroko held up a pair of holiday-patterned drink cups. “Did you want any hot chocolate?”

Kagami had that weird, deflated feeling when all the rising tension inside him was suddenly snuffed out. Because oh right, that made total sense. Kuroko had gone to get drinks. And then Kagami was just kind of pissed. “Uh, you could have told me, before you ran off like that.”

“I did say I would be back shortly.” Kuroko looked confused at first, then a bit guilty. “But… you might not have heard me.”

“You think?” Kagami growled. “It’s hard enough to keep track of you in the first place. And in this huge crowd? Come on, man. What if I couldn’t find you?”

“It’s really nothing to worry about,” Kuroko said with a frown. “I can always find you—”

“Yeah, well, what if you can’t? What if something happens, and you get held up or you need help? But then I can’t come get you, or even figure out what’s going on, because you’re basically a damn ghost?”

Kuroko looked slightly wide-eyed. At which point Kagami realized he was probably saying all of this way too loud. He tried to lower his voice.

“I’m just saying, something could have happened, okay?”

Kuroko had an expression on his face, that pretty clearly said, _“What in the world is going to happen at **Disneyland**?” _Which, uh… made sense. Kagami could see that, now that he had blurted out his weird, irrational worries all over the place.

“Look, I’m sorry,” he managed. “Just… don’t worry about it, all right?”

He let out a rough breath, trying to calm down. Seriously, what was wrong with him? Why in the hell was he so tense tonight? He shoved his hands in his pockets, and felt the envelope crinkle, the one he had been keeping tucked away.

Maybe that was why. That stupid envelope.

Kuroko was gazing at the ground. A slight crease furrowed his brow, the one he got when he was thinking. When he looked up again, he said, “I am sorry for making you worry, Kagami-kun. That wasn’t my intention.”

“Yeah. I know.” Kagami chewed on the inside of his cheek, debating what to do. “It’s cool. Sorry for being weird about it.”

He thought for like a second longer. Then he decided to just go for it. Because what the hell, might as well know if he had screwed up now, right? Instead of waiting until the night was over, and maybe ruining everything then.

So he pulled out the envelope, and held it out to Kuroko. “So, uh, this is for you? I was gonna wait until we left, but… I kind of can’t stand it anymore.”

Kuroko set the drink cups beside the railing. Carefully, he took the envelope in both hands. He glanced up at Kagami.

“Kagami-kun.” His voice was reproachful. “I thought we agreed we wouldn’t exchange gifts tonight.”

“You got me this.” Kagami pulled the goofy headband, which he had put away during one of the rides. When he saw Kuroko’s expression, he added in a hurry, “Okay, look. It’s not like that. Seriously. It’s more like an I.O.U. or whatever, because I haven’t even bought it yet, and… It’s really for myself, all right?”

He blurted out the last part, weirdly aware of how he was rambling. Kuroko was eyeing the envelope, in a puzzled way.

“That’s why I didn’t want you to get me anything,” Kagami added, embarrassed. “Because it wouldn’t be fair. And… you might not even want it anyhow.”

Kuroko blinked up at him. Without replying, he started to open the envelope. Kagami’s pulse was sprinting, and he swallowed a knot in his throat. Gently, Kuroko tugged a folded paper free. He opened it, and skimmed the writing.

Kagami already knew what it said, of course.

It was probably asking for way too much, too soon. Pushing for something too serious. Maybe Kuroko would even rethink their whole relationship because of it, but… Kagami couldn't help really wanting it anyway.

Kuroko’s voice was so soft that Kagami had to read his lips. “Is this—?”

“Yeah. Good for one plane ticket, whenever you want. You know, to California.” Kagami swallowed again. Why did his tongue feel like it wasn’t working right? “I didn’t want to pick a date or anything, because I know you need a passport, and we have to figure out our schedules and all that, but… I asked your parents, and they were okay with it. And you can come see my new place, if you want.”

Kuroko was silent, staring down at the paper.

“But you don’t have to!” Kagami added. “I know it’s a long way and all. And I don’t want to pressure you, I mean I know we’ve only been dating for ten months—”

“I want to,” Kuroko said. When he looked up at Kagami, his eyes were shining.

Kagami froze. “You do?”

Kuroko’s face broke into a grin. In a flurry of movement, he threw his arms around Kagami. Which was a shock by itself… He wasn’t really the hugging-in-public type. So either he had forgotten where they were, or he didn’t care.

“I do,” he said, a little muffled by Kagami’s jacket. “Very much.”

Kagami kind of felt like all the air had just disappeared from his lungs. He bent forward, so he could hold Kuroko even closer. And for a second, he shut his eyes. Feeling Kuroko there in his arms, wrapped up in all those winter layers. Solid and secure, and present.

Kuroko was there, with him. He wanted to be with Kagami, even if it meant crossing an ocean. And that was all that really mattered.

Kagami took a breath, and pulled back. Kuroko was gazing up him, with a seriously mushy look on his face. Which caught Kagami off guard… He didn’t know Kuroko would like the idea of visiting him so much. He wasn’t lying, when he said he thought of it as a gift for himself.

But Kuroko was looking at him like he just gave him the best present in the world.

Kagami gulped. His heart was doing that weird climbing-up-into-his-throat thing again. He felt a familiar ache, bursting inside his chest. It was the urge to tell Kuroko exactly how he felt about him, in the best way he knew how.

So he cupped the back of Kuroko’s head, pulled him in closer, and kissed him. Kuroko let out a small, silent gasp. Then he kissed Kagami right back, moving his lips in a gentle rhythm. And they both said the same thing to each other, without saying a word…

_“I love you.”_

It felt stronger tonight. More serious, somehow. Like maybe that phrase was truer, and meant even more, than they'd thought.

They pulled back, slowly. All at once, Kagami remembered that they were actually standing in a crowd. Kuroko seemed to remember too, because they both stiffened.

And okay, people were definitely staring at them this time. Which made sense, because there they were, two Japanese guys kissing next to the castle at Tokyo Disneyland. Not subtle, at all. And apparently, not even Kuroko’s weird invisible magic was making him immune. Which answered that question.

In fact, he looked pretty unnerved at the moment. Which made sense, given that he wasn’t used to people staring at him.

“Kagami-kun,” he whispered. He was blushing so hard that it was actually visible, even in the dim light inside the park. Kagami had zero idea what to do. It wasn’t like he could just take back the kiss. And he wasn’t the expert, in getting people to not look at him. His brain sprinted in circles as he tried to figure out if he should try to help Kuroko hide behind him, or at least let go of him, or what would even help…

Suddenly, a little kid’s voice cried out, “Look, Mommy! _Snow_!”

Just like that, everyone around them was looking at the cloudy sky. Sure enough, tiny white flakes were falling through the air. People were gasping, and gesturing excitedly. Kagami’s mouth slipped open.

Because what in the hell was going on? Sure, it snowed in Tokyo every once in a while, like in January. But it was snowing now, on Christmas Eve. The one night of the year where it would seem unbelievably cool and romantic, because there was basically no way it was going to happen.

It was almost like some kind of miracle.

He and Kuroko stood motionless, watching the snow. Then they inched apart, because that was probably a good idea, now that people weren’t looking at them anymore. Kuroko raised his gloved hand, and caught one of the twirling snowflakes. Snow was landing on his hat, and his hair, too. The icy flecks blended with his pale locks almost perfectly. They were hard to see.

Kagami could spot them, though, if he really tried.

An announcement came on over the park speakers, to say that the fireworks were cancelled due to weather conditions. (Wind, probably.) None of the guests seemed to mind much, though. Everyone was still admiring the falling snow, taking pictures and talking excitedly.

Kagami and Kuroko lingered in the park, until it was almost closing time. The snow was still falling, but it was light, not enough to stick to the ground. That almost made it seem more magical, somehow. Even though it was real, it wouldn’t leave any trace.

And on a night like this, a phantom-like snow was way more beautiful than some bright, showy fireworks. Kagami thought so, anyway.

He thought basically the same thing about the guy next to him, too.

He smiled at Kuroko, and Kuroko’s winter-blue eyes smiled right back. His boyfriend had his scarf over most of his face again. It had gotten colder out, to the point that even Kagami had zipped up his jacket, and was rubbing his hands to keep them from going numb.

Kagami nodded in the direction of the exit. “We should probably get you somewhere warm. Don’t want you turning even bluer.”

Kuroko nodded, as he took Kagami’s offered hand. He seemed a little distracted, like he was thinking about something.

Kagami added in a cheerful voice, “Great night though, huh?”

It was, at least in his book. He finally got to take a guy to Disneyland. And even with all his stupid fumbling, he hadn’t totally messed it up.

“It’s been a very nice night,” Kuroko agreed. He was adjusting his scarf, and the corner of his smiling mouth crept into view. “Are you attempting to take me back to your hotel room now?”

Kagami twitched. Because where the hell did that come from? There was no way he wanted Kuroko thinking that this date was supposed to be about him trying to get some action later. It was never about that at all.

“No!” He added in a mumble, “And isn’t that kind of stuff like trying to corrupt a minor or something?”

Kuroko gave him a look. “Kagami-kun, neither one of us is underage. We haven’t been for a while.”

“Whatever. There are still school rules and shit.” Kagami knew he was just making stuff up now, because Seirin didn’t have any rules about their students dating. “And I’m not gonna make your family worry, keeping you out all night.”

Kuroko was eyeing him, with that steady, pale gaze that was way too observant.

“Well, in that case, I know somewhere else we can go,” he said at last. Kagami might have worried, about that subtle smile. But there was enough warmth in Kuroko’s eyes, that Kagami already knew he was going to get let off easy.

They held hands, for the whole train ride back. Kagami savored every second of it—of that simple, amazing touch. This was what he wanted, more than anything. Just having the guy he loved by his side.

Because yeah, he was in love, with this weird ghost-like guy who used to be his basketball partner. Definitely, stupidly in love.

And when they eventually wound up at Kuroko’s house, curled up together in his living room, Kagami was able to finally relax and enjoy it. They weren’t alone in the house. Still, for the first time that night, they had some real privacy. And they kissed hour after hour, as much as they wanted, until Christmas Eve was over.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I hope everyone is having an amazing holiday season. As always, comments and kudos are deeply appreciated.
> 
>  **Next Up:** The AkaFuri chapter, which I am very excited to post!


	2. Nothing In The World Can Buy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, it's the AkaFuri chapter! I've been looking forward to being able to post this one for SO long. I had a lot of fun notes to share about the details in this part, so be sure to check out [the post over on my Tumblr](http://courtingstars.tumblr.com/post/181478825182/notes-for-nothing-in-the-world-can-buy-akafuri), if you'd like to read more about the locations. (And see a real-life picture of a certain something that's featured in the second half!) Also, if you'd like to read more of my fics about this pairing, feel free to check out my ongoing ultra-slow-burn, friends-to-lovers series, [A Spark of Light](https://archiveofourown.org/series/340342). (This chapter doesn't include any spoilers from those stories, but I do consider it loosely related.)
> 
> For today's music, [here's a string quartet version of Sleigh Ride](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MtAtKBl5kkI) I found, because it's classy and Akashi would approve, haha. [The orchestral version](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OATi34PKNPw) directed by John Williams also seems very fitting!

Akashi Seijuurou liked it when everything went according to plan. He enjoyed using both his instincts and his logical prowess to carefully select an optimal strategy, and all the best methods to execute it. He preferred to feel he had adequately considered the variables, and had enough contingencies at his disposal, in the event something went wrong.

But what he enjoyed the most by far, was when a plan made someone he loved look the way his boyfriend looked now.

“I still can’t believe we’re doing this.” Furihata’s voice was hushed, audibly giddy. He leaned a little closer toward Akashi, elbow resting on the armrest between them. He kept glancing back at the wide window of the train car.

Akashi slid his hand into Furihata’s. Furihata responded in an instant, twining their fingers together, and Akashi’s smile widened. “I thought you would have guessed this part, to be entirely truthful.”

“I should have, huh.” Furihata laughed, in his good-natured way. “You kept saying to dress warm. But the paper thing kind of threw me?”

Akashi chuckled too. At the start of their date, Akashi had met Furihata a block from Tokyo Station. He had presented his boyfriend with three slips of paper. Each one was a different color: green, red, and orange. He told Furihata to pick one, and that he would be choosing their plan for the evening. (Furihata seemed to see the humor in that. Which was one of the things Akashi treasured about him.)

Furihata chose the red slip. At which point Akashi led him into the station, to a shinkansen platform to catch a train on the Jouetsu line.

“Those were all train routes, right?” Furihata said. Akashi nodded. “And you had a plan for each one. Because of course you did.”

He said this with an admiring look, that warmed Akashi straight down to his toes.

“Now I get why you wanted to meet so early,” Furihata added, as he glanced yet again at the window. “How far are we going?”

It was clear that he was enjoying the passing scenery, even though they had barely left the city, and the countryside consisted of drab, empty fields. Akashi, for his part, was watching Furihata. “You’ll see.”

Furihata gave him a questioning smile, that was probably meant to be fond but suspicious. To Akashi, it just made Furihata’s wide brown eyes seem like they were filled with light.

As the train hurtled on, Furihata began to regale Akashi with train facts, much to Akashi’s amused satisfaction. This particular shinkansen was from the E4 series, with a double-decker car. Akashi had managed to reserve a pair of seats on the upper level, close to the front. It was no surprise that Furihata, ever the train enthusiast, was excited. And Akashi was enjoying the view right along with him, as the countryside grew darker and more mountainous.

They were leaning close together, with their hands still linked, as they kept up their conversation. As the cabin gradually grew dimmer, and the other passengers were busy looking out the windows, Akashi couldn’t resist sneaking a quiet kiss. Furihata ducked his head afterward. And even in the half-light Akashi knew his boyfriend was flushed, and glowing.

The train entered an especially long tunnel. Akashi was strongly reminded of the famous beginning to the novel _Snow Country_. Which was to be expected, since they were following in the Nobel prize-winning author’s footsteps.

_“The train came out of the long tunnel into the snow country. The earth lay white under the night sky…”_

When the train left the tunnel, the landscape had transformed. They quickly reached their stop, at the cusp of twilight. At which point Akashi and Furihata stepped off the train, and into a winter wonderland.

Furihata seemed awestruck. “This can’t be happening, right?”

Akashi understood. The town of Yuzawa was astonishingly beautiful during this time of year. The buildings were blanketed in a thick layer of shimmering snow, an amount that never fell in Tokyo. Yet it took less than an hour and a half to reach the place.

He showed Furihata around the snow-frosted town. They visited a few souvenir shops, and picked out omiyage gifts for Furihata’s relatives. Akashi took care to point out the most interesting local specialties, much to Furihata’s appreciation. He also insisted on purchasing his own gifts for Furihata’s parents and elder brother.

The two of them talked and laughed, as they explored the narrow Onsen Street. They admired the snow, and watched the steam rising from a hot spring footbath near the roadside. And they held hands, not caring who might notice, in this resort town where no one would know them.

After that, they arrived at the restaurant where Akashi had already reserved a table, right on time. The small, crowded dining room was decorated like an old-fashioned country house. Akashi and Furihata settled in on either side of the low table, on floor cushions. Udon noodles and a hot pot overflowing with seafood and vegetables soon arrived, which they cooked on a burner between them.

Hot pots were a longstanding tradition in the wintertime. They were also one of the most intimate ways to share a meal. Akashi found himself savoring every moment of the experience, as they traded smiles over the cooking pot.

“That was amazing,” Furihata sighed. He was rubbing his stomach as they left the restaurant. “How do you always find such great places?”

Akashi couldn’t help feeling pleased. “It’s just a matter of doing some light research. And occasionally taking the time to call ahead.”

Furihata was giving him that look again. The one that made Akashi feel about ten feet tall, and warmer than any meal conceivably could.

They were wandering down another street, when they caught sight of the famous Takahan Ryokan. The hot springs at this inn had been in use for centuries, and were known for their unusual alkaline levels. Akashi was explaining the many benefits of this quality to Furihata, who seemed intrigued.

“Wow,” he said, taking another glance up at the building. “I’ve never been to a spring like that before.”

“I considered adding it to our itinerary,” Akashi admitted. “But it’s better suited to an overnight stay. And there are other places here with excellent private baths, but… All of that seemed a bit, ah… well. Presumptuous. I suppose.”

He was speaking slower, and his ears were starting to feel rather hot. Why on earth had he mentioned any of that? It wasn’t like him to be so awkward.

“Why? You mean because of the price?” Furihata looked confused. Until, all at once, he didn’t in the least. “… _Oh_.”

Akashi had always marveled at just how quickly his boyfriend could turn bright red.

They weren’t quite looking at each other anymore. Furihata was fumbling with the straps of his travel bag. Akashi was suddenly grateful for the cold weather, which was the only thing keeping his face at a semi-reasonable temperature. Against his will, a teasing voice echoed inside his brain:

_“So what are all your plans for the big night? With your **lovers** , I mean.”_

Not for the first time, Akashi rued his friendship with a particular yellow-haired model with a decidedly underdeveloped sense of manners.

The trouble was, Kise had a point… Christmas Eve was famous in Japan as a holiday for couples. Adult couples, especially. It was expected that adults would spend the night with one another, in every sense of the phrase. So the evening did have certain, well, associations.

Associations that Akashi hadn’t meant to convey, at all. He and Furihata were eighteen, yes, but they were still in high school—and besides, he didn’t want to risk making his boyfriend uncomfortable.

And Furihata did indeed look uncomfortable.

He was still fidgeting with one of his bag straps. When he spoke, his voice was light, but a bit shaky. “Y-yeah, it’s probably a good thing that you didn’t. I mean, I’m sure it would’ve been really nice and everything! J-just, you know… Maybe too nice.”

His gaze was lowered, and he bit his lip. An unexpected flutter worked its way through Akashi’s insides. He knew Furihata only stammered like that around him lately when he was thinking about some kind of physical desire.

Slowly but surely, their relationship had started to cross certain lines, as they grew older. They hadn’t crossed all of them by any means—a mutual choice. For Akashi’s part, he’d never expected he would have a serious relationship until his twenties.

Still, he was finding that he enjoyed the process, of discovering each new intimacy as they became ready to share it.

Gently, Akashi reached for Furihata’s hand. Furihata relaxed at his touch, and Akashi took care to give him a smile. “Well, perhaps another time in the future.”

Furihata’s chest rose and fell in a quick breath. “S-sure. Yeah.” He smiled too. Then he added, in a funny little mumble, “Like if you really wanna kill me.”

Akashi couldn’t help but wonder why he suddenly felt intrigued, by the idea of pleasing his boyfriend that much.

He pushed the thought aside. It wasn’t relevant at the moment. He squeezed Furihata’s hand in a friendly way, hoping to prevent any further awkwardness.

“In any case, I had already devised a different plan,” he said, in a cheerful tone. “We’ll need to be back in Tokyo by nine.”

He was glad when the curiosity rekindled in Furihata’s eyes. They reached the end of an empty street. Akashi was about to suggest heading back to the train station, when Furihata drew in a soft gasp. A slight motion flickered in the corner of Akashi’s vision. He looked up.

Snow had started to fall. The flakes drifted down in flittering swirls. Around them, the town was utterly silent. Its streetlights cast a golden glow into the dark night. Furihata’s head was raised, and a snowflake landed on the apple of his cheek. His fawnlike eyes were wide, as he continued to watch the sky.

“Wow,” he whispered. And Akashi felt as though every cell in his body was murmuring in agreement.

They stood close together, frozen in the moment. The snow was already falling faster. Akashi found himself wishing to stay here as long as he possibly could, just memorizing how everything looked—the picturesque little town, the falling snow, and the awed expression of the person he loved most in the world.

He felt a light pressure beside his temple, and came back to reality. Furihata was touching his hair, brushing it with the chilled fingertips of his gloves. It took Akashi a moment to realize that he must have snow in his hair. A sprinkling of sugar-white flakes had landed on Furihata’s head as well. He was wearing a hat when they arrived, but he had apparently forgotten to replace it after dinner.

They gazed at one another. They were standing unusually close. Furihata was blinking a little fast, and Akashi was fairly certain that they were going to pull even closer together, and sneak a kiss on the vacant street corner. But then Furihata took a step back.

“So, um… I was thinking…” He reached for his bag, like he was trying to distract himself, and zipped it open. “Would it be okay if I gave you my gift here?”

Akashi softened. “Of course. But you didn’t need to give me anything. You were already more than generous, on my birthday.”

Akashi had turned eighteen a few days earlier. Furihata had insisted on treating him to a brief date, since Akashi had come into town early for the Winter Cup. They had passed a very pleasant evening together. Exceptionally pleasant, as a matter of fact… Akashi hoped his comment didn’t come across as suggestive. He didn’t want to cause Furihata to feel embarrassed again.

“It was nothing, really.” Furihata laughed a bit, though he did looked flushed. “And you always say that. Like I’m going to let you take me on some super-fancy Christmas date, and not get you a present?”

“You said you’d be fine with whatever I decided,” Akashi reminded him. Furihata just laughed again, more easily this time.

“Trust me, this isn’t that great. But I thought maybe you could use it anyway.”

He pulled a nicely wrapped box out of his bag, and handed it to Akashi. Akashi accepted it with both hands, taking care to compliment the wrapping. Furihata’s expression was cheerful, though he appeared a little anxious.

Akashi opened the box, and blinked in surprise. Lying inside was a hat, made with thick fabric and featuring a flat top and slender front brim. It was a timeless sort of style, that would likely be purchased from a higher-end department store.

Furihata was shifting on his feet.

“I know you don’t really wear hats?” He was talking in that quick way he had, when he was trying to explain something. “But it’s good to have them when it’s cold. So I thought if I could find something to match the kind of clothes you wear… There’s a plain beanie in there too, if you’d rather keep your ears warm, but…”

His shoulders were hunching slightly, as he twined his gloved fingers together. Akashi removed the hat from the box, examining it with interest. The stitching was high quality, and the dark tweed fabric was an elegant, subtle neutral.

“You don’t have to wear it if you don’t like it, though,” Furihata added quickly. “Really! I can return it.”

Akashi smiled at him.

“I like this a great deal,” he said, with utmost sincerity. “It’s very classic.”

He shifted the box under one arm, then placed the hat upon his head. Though he was far from a clothing expert, Akashi could tell the style of the hat would suit the thick, tailored coat he was wearing. The brim was an ideal size as well, he noted, comfortable without being loose.

“How did you go about selecting it?” he added, suddenly curious. “I never realized you were so savvy about fashion.”

“I’m really not.” Furihata sighed, much to Akashi’s bewilderment. “I got a lot of advice. And I mean a _lot_.”

“Ah.” Now Akashi was beginning to understand. “Shall I hazard a guess as to who these overzealous consultants were?”

“I bet it’s obvious.” There was a sheepish look on Furihata’s face. “Just for future reference, never put Kise and Reo-nee in the same group chat. Unless you want like five thousand messages about clothes.”

He sounded almost pained. Akashi couldn’t help chuckling. It was all too easy to imagine this particular scenario.

“I’m impressed by your initiative,” he said. “That’s a highly qualified committee—if on the formidable side.”

“Yeah. It got pretty, uh, intense?” Furihata shook his head. “They were talking about your face shape and how you’re more of a ‘winter’ than a ‘spring,’ even though you have red hair, and… I had no idea what they were talking about.”

Akashi chuckled again. He adjusted the hat, making sure that it was sitting straight. Furihata was watching him, with a slightly odd look. Akashi was about to ask if the hat was still crooked, when Furihata averted his gaze.

“Sorry,” he said, though he sounded pleased. “It’s just… That really does look good on you.”

He was chewing the inside of his lip again. Akashi recognized that look—and the truth was, he was learning to enjoy causing it. Not so much for his own sake, but because he knew how he must be making his boyfriend feel.

Which was why he took a step closer, and gently cupped Furihata’s chin. He lifted it slightly, so that Furihata would keep looking at him. And he said, with a sly smile, “Well, in that case, I’m certainly not about to return it.”

He felt Furihata’s jaw twitch beneath his hand. He had a feeling that Furihata was torn between making some quip of his own—or doing something else, something decidedly different. Those wide brown eyes were growing rather dark, Akashi noticed. He felt his own heart skip a beat in response.

And so he took the lead again, pulling in closer, and pressing his lips to Furihata’s.

He heard a familiar little hitch. Furihata’s breath tended to catch when they kissed. His nose was chilled from the cold, as it brushed against Akashi’s cheek. But his lips were warm, and so was his breath, once his lungs resumed working. It clouded the air between them, mingling with Akashi’s.

Akashi murmured a bit, enjoying the nearness. He let his hand drop, until his arm was looped around Furihata’s shoulders. His other hand rested on Furihata’s waist, keeping him close. Their mouths lingered, shifting in a slow but fervent rhythm.

Akashi wasn’t an especially physical person, in most respects. But there was something about the intimacy he enjoyed with Furihata that helped him to feel more present, fully grounded in the moment. He found himself experiencing every sensation more strongly: the icy snap of the air, the quickening thrum of his own heartbeat, and each subtle movement of Furihata’s body beneath his touch.

It was healing, somehow. Eventually, Akashi was able to bring himself to pull away, just far enough to meet Furihata’s eyes again.

“Thank you,” he murmured. Furihata wore a familiar, half-dazed expression. He raised a hand to Akashi’s face, and Akashi fully expected they would kiss again.

Instead, Furihata traced his temple, just beneath the brim of the hat. He seemed to be examining the hat closely, admiring how it looked—and also something else.

“Is it warm?” His voice was a bit husky, still traced with desire. But at the same time, he sounded genuinely curious. “Or not really?”

Akashi felt that odd pang in his chest, the one that always struck him when he realized Furihata was going out of his way to take care of him. No wonder Furihata had wanted to give him his present, while they were still in snow country.

“Quite warm,” Akashi assured him. He paused, then took the box from beneath his arm. He produced the beanie Furihata had also given him, which was on the thicker side, to his satisfaction. Carefully, he slipped it onto Furihata’s head, tugging it in place over Furihata’s pink-tipped ears.

“There,” he said, voice lowered. “I can’t have you getting cold, either.”

Furihata looked even pinker now, though presumably it wasn’t from the weather. “I, uh… Thanks?” He laughed. “I can use mine, though. I just forgot.”

“That’s all right. I’d like to lend this to you,” Akashi said. “Though I will be wanting it back. A very precious person gave it to me.”

He caressed the side of Furihata’s face. The hat really did suit him, Akashi thought, with the way it framed his soft brown hair. Or perhaps that was simply due to how adorable he was to begin with.

Furihata’s blush was gradually spreading and deepening, as though Akashi was tracing the crimson hue into his skin. Furihata had a tendency to blush very easily, and Akashi had to admit that he found it charming. But then again, he seemed to find everything about his boyfriend impossibly charming.

Like now, when Furihata was staring up at Akashi with lidded eyes and a red-tipped nose, and making no attempt to hide all the longing he clearly felt.

Akashi stopped to remove his gloves, then took Furihata’s face into his hands again. He kissed that wind-chilled nose, tenderly, then began to trail his lips across Furihata’s frosty cheeks. Slowly warming him, by lending his own heat. Akashi used his hands as well, shielding both sides of Furihata’s face from the cold.

Furihata let out a hushed sigh, and Akashi felt a shiver that had nothing to do with the snow. Soon Furihata was kissing him as well, in much the same way. Akashi wasn’t certain how long they stood there, sharing their warmth with each other.

Eventually, however, he managed to come to his senses enough to realize that they were about to miss their train. They dashed toward the station, keeping ahold of each other’s hands, and laughing at their own foolishness. Really, Akashi didn’t know what it was about Furihata that sometimes made him forget himself, and do things he normally never would. Even to the point of kissing his boyfriend over and over on a street corner, where there was no guarantee of privacy.

He supposed it could simply be what everyone said, about being young and in love. That he was just getting caught up in the usual youthful impulses, and allowing his emotions to carry him away, to the point of being uncharacteristically irresponsible now and then.

Still, Akashi had to admit that he often wondered if the intensity of what he felt for Furihata was truly typical, when it came to having a high school relationship.

He couldn’t deny the constant urge he felt, to share every part of himself with Furihata. Emotionally, physically—and monetarily as well. Akashi wanted to give Furihata everything he could, not only as proof of his affections, but because he didn’t want to have to withhold anything from someone he loved so dearly… Which extended to an evening like this, where he fully intended to spare no expense, and lavish at least a few excesses on his more-than-deserving boyfriend.

Akashi had done his best to subdue these urges, the first year they were dating. All his friends had reminded him constantly that too much generosity early in a relationship could backfire. So when for their first Christmas Eve as a couple, Furihata suggested that they spend a cozy, simple night with his family, Akashi had gladly agreed. He was a model of restraint that year.

(True, he had shown up with presents for Furihata’s whole family, including a model train set, which he knew Furihata wanted very much and couldn’t afford… But all in all, quite restrained.)

This year, however, Akashi wanted to give Furihata the most wonderful Christmas Eve he could. One single night where money, and perhaps the occasional miracle, was no object. Something truly romantic, that expressed everything he felt toward his boyfriend. And not just his boyfriend—the person who had arguably changed him the most, out of all the wonderful people in his life.

There was a letter tucked deep in Akashi’s coat pocket, beside a small rectangular box, that included plenty of words to this effect.

_“I still marvel at how much I’ve changed since we met, and how deeply I wish for you to be happy—and how entirely the heart I now have belongs to you.”_

Still, Akashi hoped the night itself would express his emotions, just as eloquently. For once, he wanted to show how it truly felt, to be loved by someone as caring and sincere as Furihata—as well as being able to love so much in return. How extravagant, and impossible, it still seemed to him.

He only hoped Furihata wouldn’t mind. That he would understand, why Akashi had wanted so badly to do this.

That in the end, it was just another way to show Furihata exactly how much he adored him.

* * *

Furihata Kouki was getting increasingly suspicious of his boyfriend. And by suspicious, Furihata meant that he was doing his best to prepare himself, for when his jaw would inevitably lose the ability to close. Like, ever again.

It wasn’t like he actually _minded_. Akashi was so good at considering his feelings, even when it came to doing all the ridiculously nice things, that a normal teenager couldn’t afford. He always asked in advance if Furihata would be uncomfortable, with anything extra expensive. And they went on plenty of other dates, that were just the normal, low-cost, high school kind of stuff.

Sure, Furihata had felt a little bad, once or twice. Mostly because the truth was, he really enjoyed the fancy stuff they did. But he kept seeing how happy it made Akashi, and he _wanted_ Akashi to feel that way. So if Akashi needed to spoil him rotten to get that super glowy look on his face, Furihata wasn’t going to fight it. No matter what all of his dutiful family scruples told him.

Which might have been rationalizing. But Furihata was only human, right? Just a regular middle-class human, who was way too easily bribed with trains.

He was looking around the cabin, during the ride back to Tokyo. They were on another double-decker E4 shinkansen. The top level again, which had a way better view. Furihata couldn’t believe he was getting to ride on this type of train twice in one day.

“So how do you know me so well, anyway?” he said to Akashi, who was watching him with one of those _“My boyfriend is so adorable”_ looks on his face. (It seemed like it should have been more of a “ _My boyfriend is the world’s biggest nerd”_ kind of look, but hey, Furihata wasn’t going to complain.)

Akashi chuckled. His eyes were such an impossibly vivid shade of red, even in the dim lighting of the cabin. “It’s good to hear I haven’t lost my touch. I would hate to change plans at the last minute.”

“Wait.” Furihata straightened, suddenly getting an idea. “Are we going on another shinkansen?” He was still so curious about what they were doing next. Maybe it had something to do with trains, too?

Akashi shook his head. “Sadly, no. But there are a few things that are somewhat train-related.”

Furihata was lost. He wasn’t sure what they could do in Tokyo at night that was related to trains. Not to mention how anything could be “somewhat” train-related. But maybe Akashi just meant they were just taking one of the local lines somewhere?

“Okay, it’s official. I have no clue what you’re up to,” he admitted. Akashi just smiled at him. Furihata leaned back in his chair, ready to enjoy the ride. It was funny how with Akashi, he didn’t mind doing that. Normally, surprises sort of stressed him out. He always wanted to be prepared, for what was coming next.

But when Akashi was in charge, Furihata knew he could completely relax, and just focus on enjoying himself. There was something almost soothing about it, in a way. Even though he found it pretty exciting, too.

He glanced at his boyfriend. Akashi was checking his phone. Which was probably full of super-important messages that he should have been answering, and wasn’t. Because he was the nicest, most considerate boyfriend in the universe.

He was still wearing the hat Furihata got him. Furihata couldn’t help admiring how well the shape complimented the slim lines of Akashi’s face. His pale, elegant features were sharply contoured in the light of his phone screen. He looked really grown-up. Oh, yeah, and impossibly gorgeous.

Furihata suppressed a sigh. Why did it seem like Akashi was getting even more handsome lately? That shouldn’t have been physically possible.

He resisted the urge to reach over and just start kissing his too-attractive-to-be-real boyfriend. The feeling was more or less constant for him these days. Kind of a problem, since making out in public was something you weren’t supposed to do.

Instead, Furihata focused on the double-decker cabin around him, and on train facts. Train facts were his constant refuge. They worked for easing anxiety—and also for inappropriate, hot-boyfriend-related urges.

When the hot boyfriend in question put his phone away, Furihata started sharing some more facts with him, too. Because yeah, the two of them were in public, and normally, Furihata could count on Akashi not to do anything too physical. But the semi-dark train cabin was enough of a temptation that Akashi might sneak another kiss. And if he did that, Furihata honestly didn’t know if he’d be able to stop himself, from grabbing Akashi by his coat collar and kissing his brains out.

Pretty much the constant peril, of dating a guy like Akashi Seijuurou.

Luckily, Akashi didn’t seem to be on the verge of trying to kiss him. Instead he was listening to Furihata ramble, with a fond look in his catlike eyes. They were holding hands again, and Furihata was halfway through explaining something about one of the other shinkansen lines, and how it was related to the Joetsu one.

Akashi leaned closer, and squeezed his fingers. And he said, in a low voice, “Someday, I’d like to explore every train line in this country with you.”

And Furihata completely forgot about any urges from before. Because he kind of felt like Akashi had just shot him straight through the heart, with the biggest, sparkliest arrow ever. He tried not to take it literally… He knew something like that would take way too much time. As in years. Maybe more like decades.

It was the kind of time neither of them would probably have. Either separately, or together. For about a million different reasons.

Still, that wasn’t going to stop Furihata from fantasizing about it. Because he knew he would jump at that deal in a heartbeat, if it were possible. Just the two of them, riding on train after train, across all of Japan. Exploring each stop, exactly like what they did today…

To Furihata, it sounded basically like heaven.

It wasn’t long before their train arrived back in Tokyo. As they stepped onto the platform, Furihata paused. Tiny flecks were drifting through the air. The people waiting on the platform were all staring up at the clouds.

It was snowing, in Tokyo. On Christmas Eve.

“Wow.” Furihata turned to Akashi, voice hushed with wonder. “It’s almost like we brought the snow here, or something.”

Akashi seemed amazed too, as he studied the stormy sky. When he looked back at Furihata, his eyes were twinkling like string lights. “Who knows? Perhaps we did.”

They beamed at each other, as they headed into Tokyo station. Akashi led the way to the local Yamanote line, one of the most popular routes around the city. So Furihata was right about that part, at least. He wondered if maybe they were getting dessert, since they hadn’t done that yet. It was kind of a thing, on Christmas Eve dates.

When they reached the platform, a bunch of people were still pointing out the snow, as it fell between the overhangs. There were more than a few couples, smiling and holding hands, cozying up just a little closer to each other. Furihata hoped they were all having a good night… Both these couples, who he didn’t know, and also the couples he did.

The train was packed, but Akashi and Furihata only rode for a handful of stops before exiting again. Furihata couldn’t figure out why they were getting out at this particular stop. He ticked through all his knowledge about Tokyo, trying to recall everything that was nearby. He couldn’t remember anything amazing or famous in this area.

Well, besides one very obvious thing. But he was sure they weren’t going there.

Except apparently, they were? As they headed out onto the street, they linked arms. And Akashi led Furihata straight up to one of the most famous structures in all Tokyo. The orange and white tower was shining brilliantly, with special pink and blue lights for the Christmas season.

“Tokyo Tower?” Furihata couldn’t help voicing his surprise. They were approaching from the south end, so he could already see the famous big heart, glowing on the side of the main deck. “That’s where we’re going?”

Akashi nodded. He had a strange look in his eyes, and Furihata knew his boyfriend was hiding something. Beneath all that calculated attempt at mystery, there was a definite feeling of excitement bubbling up there. Sensing it didn’t help Furihata figure out what was going on, though.

Actually, as Christmas stuff went, Tokyo Tower was pretty normal? Almost weirdly so… They had a seasonal light display that was really popular with couples. But it wasn’t the kind of place Furihata expected to be going, when Akashi asked his permission to come up with a super-special date.

“I know it’s somewhat run-of-the-mill,” Akashi said, in a breezy tone. “But it’s one of the few places in Tokyo we haven’t visited together. And I think it will be enjoyable.”

Furihata wasn’t going to argue with that. He’d never gotten the chance to see the lights on Christmas Eve before—especially not with a date. It was probably one of the most classic things a couple in Tokyo could do together.

He leaned a bit closer, and wound his arm tighter around Akashi’s. “Yeah, of course! It’s really romantic.”

He wasn’t sure why Akashi looked touched, like he hadn’t expected that reaction.

The area at the base of the tower was super crowded, no surprise there. They wandered through the light display at a snail’s place, getting lost in a sea of couples. They got a few odd looks, but Furihata didn’t care, to be honest. Either these people could tell what was really going on, but they weren’t going to say anything—or they were just wondering why two guys who seemed like such close friends had decided to visit the tower on Christmas Eve.

And they weren’t totally wrong, Furihata thought. He _was_ with his best friend. His best friend just also happened to be his boyfriend, too.

They squeezed through the crowd. Akashi asked if Furihata wanted to go up to the main deck, showing him a pair of tickets he had bought in advance. Furihata was a little surprised he had bothered, since it was easy to get tickets. But it meant they could skip the line. So he happily agreed.

They rode in the elevator, then walked in a slow circle around the main observation deck. Furihata wasn’t great with heights, but he was pretty used to Tokyo Tower. (It was kind of obligatory, for every kid who grew up in Tokyo.) At nighttime, the sweeping cityscape looked surreal, like an interlocking grid of multicolored lights.

They were approaching the elevators to go back to the ground floor, when Akashi stopped to speak to an attendant. Furihata didn’t catch what he said, but the lady nodded, then disappeared. Furihata eyed Akashi. He definitely got the sense that something was going on. “What was that about?”

Before Akashi could answer him—or, more likely, not answer—the lady returned with a man in a suit. He bowed, in that familiar way that proved he somehow knew who Akashi was, and had some kind of obligation toward his family. The next thing Furihata knew, they were being escorted toward a different set of elevators. There was a sign in front, indicating that the elevators weren’t in service.

“Seriously, what’s going on?” he whispered. But Akashi just smiled, of course.

The man moved the sign, then led them into the elevator. He apologized for the inconvenience, with another bow. Furihata didn’t know what he was apologizing for, since customers clearly weren’t supposed to be going in here.

The man hit a button, clearly marked “Special Observatory.” Then, they started going up.

Furihata was staring at Akashi, bewildered. He was pretty sure he had seen a notice that the upper deck was closed early, like maybe for cleaning or something. His ears popped, as they climbed higher. The elevator lurched to a stop.

When the doors opened, Furihata literally couldn’t believe his eyes.

The smaller observatory was completely empty. One part of the floor was marked off, for some kind of cleaning. An even loftier view of Tokyo glittered outside the sweeping windows. Strangest of all, the entire ceiling of the observatory was decorated, with thousands of tiny red and white lights.

Furihata managed to step out of the elevator, but he was too stunned to move any farther. He knew the main deck sometimes had light displays for different holidays. But he didn’t think the upper one did.

“What—what is all this?” he managed. “I thought it wasn’t open.”

“It isn’t, officially,” Akashi said. Probably to reassure him he wasn’t hallucinating. “They just completed an inspection, and they’re preparing to reopen. But I thought it might be nice to take advantage of the privacy, in the meantime.”

Furihata just gaped at his boyfriend, and at the lights, which were twinkling in subtle patterns. The man in the suit was ushering them toward a table in the middle of the display. It was covered with a spotless white cloth. A platter of hors d'oeuvres sat in the center, next to a few bottles in a bucket of ice, and some crystal glasses.

_It’s like a party._ Furihata couldn’t even voice his disbelief out loud this time. _He planned this whole thing. He reserved the entire top deck of Tokyo Tower, which shouldn’t even be possible, because it wasn’t freaking **open**._

_What in the actual heck is my life?_

The man in the suit took their bags and coats, setting them on some nearby folding chairs. Meanwhile, Akashi was opening one of the bottles. He poured a fizzy gold liquid into two of the glasses. Then he offered a glass to Furihata, who took it, even though he still had like zero idea what was going on.

“Non-alcoholic,” Akashi told him. “I didn’t want you to worry.” He leaned in and lowered his voice, in a way that sent a tiny shiver up Furihata’s spine. “Though I’d be more than happy to break the rules with you tonight, if you’d like.”

Furihata couldn’t help but laugh. Akashi knew him a little too well. (Though it was probably the less nerve-wracking thing ever to drink alcohol as a minor… Nobody in Japan really cared about that law.)

“I’m good with this, for now,” he assured Akashi. “But—but maybe I’ll have a sip or two later? If you wanted me to try something else, I mean. I just really want to make sure I remember everything tonight.”

Akashi’s eyes were glowing, with a downy sort of softness. “I feel the same.”

They watched the lights blinking in the room around them, and they sampled a few of the hors d'oeuvres. All of which were amazing, of course. The champagne was great, too. Furihata had never tasted anything like it before. It was kind of sharp, and fruity-sweet. The beadlike bubbles shimmered, dancing along with the lights.

“Make sure you save some room for dessert,” Akashi said at one point. “I believe it’s on its way.”

So while they were talking, Furihata tried to think of the most impossible thing that this dessert could be. By now, it seemed like the only natural outcome, on a night like this… He tried to picture the most amazing Christmas dessert he could. Some cake that looked like it was made of gold, or glitter, or heck, actual gemstones.

He didn’t even come close.

The elevator doors opened, and another man came into the room, wheeling a cart. Furihata almost dropped his champagne glass.

He was pretty sure it was a cake, or something like one. But it didn’t look like any cake he had ever seen before. It looked exactly like a toy train, made from chocolate.

He had no idea what to say. He was just stuttering incoherently, at this point.

Akashi had a mischievous look on his face. “Do you like it? It was a Christmas special at the Ritz Carlton this year. As soon as I saw it, I knew I needed to order one.”

“Wha—ri—ha—” Eventually Furihata finally managed to get a few actual words out. “The Ritz Carlton? You got a cake from—do they even make cakes?”

“They have a bakery inside the hotel.” Akashi looked like he was torn between the urge to laugh, and ask if Furihata was all right. “It was advertised in association with the Tokyo Midtown events this year.”

Okay, Furihata thought. So it wasn’t that weird, then. (Except yeah, really weird, because what were the odds of that?) Sure enough, he felt like he couldn’t close his jaw anymore. “But wasn’t it super expensive?”

“It was reasonably priced,” Akashi said, before taking a measured sip of champagne.

_Yup, expensive._ Furihata shook his head, still disbelieving. He had no clue how Akashi always managed to come up with such amazing gifts.

They both took a bunch of pictures of the cake, because it was way too pretty not to. Then Akashi offered a cake knife to Furihata. Furihata had Akashi cut it instead, though. (He was a little too giddy at the moment to trust himself with a blade.) With his usual skill, Akashi sliced into part of the train's engine, revealing the thick cake beneath the layers of chocolate. Then he handed Furihata a perfectly cut piece, along with a few of the macaron confections that were tucked inside the train as cargo.

“Is it good?” Akashi asked, once Furihata had taken a bite.

‘Good’ was definitely not the right word, Furihata thought, for something this sweet and rich. “It’s amazing. Like chocolate heaven.”

Akashi looked really happy about that, like he was enjoying Furihata’s words even more than the cake. (Which Furihata didn’t completely understand, to be honest, because seriously… This cake was incredible.)

Furihata had another piece, too, because it was just that delicious. But the cake was so rich he knew he couldn’t eat any more. Which seemed like a problem, because the train was pretty big, for a Christmas cake. It seemed awful to waste any of it. “What are we going to do with the rest?”

“I was planning on having it sent to your home,” Akashi said. “If you think your family would like to try it too, that is.”

“Um, yeah!” Furihata said, with the warmth he always felt, whenever Akashi thought of his family. “I’m sure they would.”

(He chose not to mention that when his mom saw the cake, she would probably have one of her usual mini freak-outs. She was always torn between the fact that she now basically considered Akashi Seijuurou a member of the family, but at the same time he kept sending so many amazing gifts that they couldn’t reciprocate. She got over it every time.)

“As long as it’s not too much trouble, though,” he added.

“Not at all,” Akashi said, and Furihata knew he was being honest. Akashi always seemed to find ways to do things that should have been difficult or complicated. (Or impossible, even.)

They had finished what they could of the cake, and were on their last few sips of champagne. As they watched the glowing city through the long windows, they exchanged lingering looks. Like they were savoring each other’s company, even more than they had savored their dessert.

Akashi checked the nice wristwatch he sometimes wore. Which kind of surprised Furihata, because it meant he was still keeping track of the time.

“Are we going somewhere else too?” Furihata’s head was already spinning, at the idea of even more surprises.

“No,” Akashi said, but he looked playful. “I was just thinking that I haven’t given you your gift yet.”

Furihata couldn’t help goggling at him. “Uh, gift? It wasn’t all of this?”

He nodded to the sparkling room around them, and the cake, and the rest of the food on the table. Akashi shook his head, with a slight laugh. “I wasn’t about to neglect giving you a proper present.”

He glided over to one of the chairs, and rifled through his coat. As he rejoined Furihata, he was holding a small, rectangular package, and a letter. The package was expertly wrapped, in shiny metallic paper. Furihata hesitated. He knew Akashi would want him to take the gift right away. To simply accept it, like he had accepted everything tonight.

Still, he couldn’t help saying something this time.

“You really didn’t need to,” he said. “I know I got you one, but… It doesn’t even come close to all the stuff you did today.”

Akashi frowned slightly, like he didn’t understand why this mattered. “I happen to think that what you gave me was wonderful.”

“I know. But all of this was _perfect_.” Furihata gestured vaguely to the room again. Which didn’t even include all the stuff they did before they got to Tokyo Tower. He added, “You even bought the train tickets.”

“Technically, I used your pass to reserve them,” Akashi said slowly. Like he already knew the obvious flaw in that point.

Furihata couldn’t resist giving him a look anyway. “Uh-huh. Which you gave me.”

Akashi was silent for a moment. The display lights around them cast his face in shifting planes of red and white. He stepped toward Furihata, and pulled him gently into his arms. Furihata’s pulse skipped a startled beat.

Akashi leaned closer, until their foreheads were touching. His expression was serious, almost painfully so. Suddenly, it felt a whole lot harder for Furihata to breathe. Akashi closed his eyes.

“You know everything you’ve done for me,” he said, in a hushed voice. The sheer force of feeling in it made Furihata’s heart twist. “There is no amount of money I could spend that would properly repay you. It’s literally priceless.”

Furihata shut his eyes too. He could feel his knees going weak. It was almost too much to handle, when Akashi got like this.

“Guess so,” he managed, in a whisper. The truth was, he knew what Akashi was talking about, and he accepted it. Akashi had told him many times what their connection really meant to him. And when Furihata thought back over the course of their relationship, and everything that had happened between them, he understood why. In Akashi’s place, he would have felt the same way about it.

But it wasn’t some kind of debt to repay. And the reason for that was obvious, to Furihata at least. He opened his eyes and raised his hand, pressing it gingerly against Akashi’s chest. In a certain spot where a steady, pounding rhythm was pulsing beneath Akashi’s sweater. Furihata met his gaze.

“Pretty sure I already got something priceless too,” he said.

Akashi’s expression was so moved, that it honestly hurt to look at. His eyelids lowered, as they inched even closer together. Furihata could still feel Akashi’s heart, throbbing away beneath his palm. It was going harder and harder, and Furihata’s own heart was whooshing in his ears, as Akashi raised a hand to his face.

“Kouki,” he breathed, and the tenderness in his voice as he said the name stole every last bit of the air left in Furihata’s lungs.

Their lips met, with overwhelming sureness. They kissed, and kissed again, and pretty soon Furihata was holding on to Akashi’s shoulders, just to make sure he stayed upright. Akashi’s lips were so warm, and sweet from the champagne. His familiar scent, along with the subtle spice of the cologne he sometimes wore, made Furihata shiver straight down to his toes.

Sometimes he wondered how it was possible, for him to want someone this badly. To be this deeply in love, when he was only eighteen. It just felt like so… _much_. The feeling of loving Akashi was exactly what Furihata had always wanted—what he had dreamed about—when it came to romance.

Honestly, it felt like finding a soul mate.

When they finally drew apart, Akashi’s eyes were candle-bright. He lowered his arms, in a reluctant sort of way. He was still holding the package in one hand. Hesitantly, he held it up again.

“I don’t know if it helps,” he said, in his quiet voice. “But I didn’t spend anything, on this particular item. And I hope you’ll accept it. It would mean a great deal to me.”

Furihata knit his brows. He had to admit he was curious now, about what the gift could be. The wrapping sure looked expensive. But maybe Akashi had just taken it somewhere to get it professionally done?

He accepted the box with both hands. It felt kind of heavy, for something that was on the small side. With a glance at Akashi, he started to carefully unwrap the foil paper.

It peeled away to reveal a hinged box. It was the type that people normally used to give jewelry. It looked really fancy too. There was no way whatever was inside didn’t cost money, Furihata thought.

And now he was started to freak out a little, for a different reason. Because what if Akashi had gone and done something completely reckless, all of a sudden? It didn’t seem like him, but… Maybe he wanted to give Furihata a gift that represented some kind of commitment, or promise to each other. Then Furihata would have to explain that he couldn’t accept it, and they really shouldn’t be making any promises like that when they didn’t know if they could—and probably wouldn’t—keep them.

He didn’t want to explain that. Because he assumed that Akashi already knew. And they were both trying not to think about it, until they absolutely had to.

Furihata’s hands were shaking, as he pried open the box. But there wasn’t any fancy jewelry inside—or at least, not the types he suspected. Lying on a bed of red silk was a vintage pocket watch. On the golden cover was an ornate design of a train.

“What is this?” He lifted the watch from the box. The polished metal gleamed in the light. On the back cover was a dated inscription, beneath an engraving of the Akashi family crest. As Furihata read the inscription, his eyes widened.

“It was made to commemorate one of the first railroads in Japan,” Akashi said, confirming what Furihata was seeing. “My family assisted with the construction. The family head at the time received this, as thanks for his involvement.”

Furihata’s mouth was open again. He turned the watch over, and opened the clasp on the cover to reveal the shining watch face, with its delicately scrolled numbers. He shook his head, then shook it a second time.

The watch was beautiful. Exactly the kind of amazing, priceless antique he would’ve loved to own. But…

“I—I really can’t accept this,” he choked out. “It’s your family’s, and—”

He held it out to Akashi, by the gilded chain. But Akashi slipped it back into Furihata’s palm, pressing it in place with both hands.

“It doesn’t have any sentimental value.” His tone was gentle, but insistent. “I wouldn’t have asked you to accept it otherwise. In all honesty, it’s the kind of item that will likely end up at an auction, sooner or later. I would much rather you have it, as something you can keep in your family, and perhaps pass down someday. I know you’ll appreciate it far more.”

There was a weird lump rising in Furihata’s throat. Each word Akashi said left him more and more speechless. He cradled the watch in his hand, and ran a finger along the cool, smooth side. He turned it over, and looked at the engraving of the Akashi crest again.

That was what this was about, he realized. Akashi wanted him to have something from his family. Something that, in a small way, would keep Furihata connected to that legacy. Even if the two of them couldn’t always stay together, he would still have this, as a reminder of everything they were able to do for each other.

His eyes were starting to sting a little. He couldn’t hold back a shaky smile. Akashi was watching him, like he was still unsure if Furihata would accept the gift.

And yeah, Furihata wasn’t supposed to take it, if he only cared about being polite. But knowing what it really meant, to Akashi and to him… There was no way he was going to say no.

“Okay,” he stammered out, still overcome. Akashi’s face relaxed then, reflecting his smile right back. Furihata was about to try to say thank you, when Akashi tipped his head toward the window. Like he was gesturing at something.

Furihata blinked, not understanding. Until Akashi murmured, “Can you see it? Down there.”

Furihata turned his head. At first, all he could see was the vast Tokyo skyline, glittering like billions of stars. Then his gaze landed on a particular constellation of lights, and stopped there. He could barely comprehend what he was looking at. White lights were arranged in an unusual formation, across the rooftops of three neighboring skyscrapers. All together, they formed a message.

The lights spelled out:

**_Thank You, Furihata Kouki_ **

Furihata took a step back, and raised his hand to his mouth. It was impossible. He couldn’t imagine how many lights it took, to make a message that big. Or how Akashi could even do such a thing. No matter how many buildings his dad owned.

Akashi held up the envelope, the one Furihata had already forgotten about.

“You know that I’ll never be a man of few words,” he said, with modest humor. “So I wrote more of my thoughts in here. You’re welcome to read it later. But…” He nodded to the lights, glowing far below them. “This is what I wanted to say to you, most of all. Thank you, for everything.”

He bowed his head slightly, as he handed Furihata the letter. Furihata accepted it, almost without realizing he had. Akashi met his eyes, with a careful sort of intention.

“I love you, Kouki,” he said.

Each word ached with the passion and sincerity that always came so naturally to him. And Furihata could have sworn he felt his heart actually melt, pooling into a sort of helpless, overwhelmed puddle.

Meanwhile, another liquid was definitely threatening to spill over, because his eyes were feeling really wet. Furihata didn’t try to fight it, though. He didn’t want to, in moments like this. When he felt so happy and overwhelmed that he thought he might burst.

It was kind of funny, he thought, how the whole journey of getting to know Akashi Seijuurou had made him realize that it was okay, to need to cry a little sometimes.

Tears slipped down his face, one after another. Akashi reached for him, and Furihata gladly went into his arms. He lowered his head, and rested it on Akashi’s shoulder. The city lights were still shimmering in the corner of his eye, a blurry veil of brilliance.

When his eyes had cleared a little, he read the message in the lights again. Letting it burn into his memory. Because this was one miracle he never wanted to forget.

Akashi was rubbing his back, in a comforting way. Furihata raised his head and wiped the tears away, wanting to show that he was all right.

“I hope none of this was too upsetting,” Akashi said. He looked kind of concerned. Furihata rushed to reassure him.

“No. It wasn’t.” He cuddled closer to his boyfriend. “It was all just really… perfect.”

He meant it. Akashi had given him so many things he wanted, even when Furihata had no idea he wanted them. Sometimes it felt like Akashi was able to peek into his heart, and read everything inside it. Like some kind of book only he could open.

Furihata knew at least one of the phrases that was written in there, over and over. He probably didn’t need to say it out loud. But he did anyway, in a whisper.

“I love you too, Sei.”

He started the kiss this time, a long one that left them both wrapped up together, as they admired the city lights below.

Furihata wasn’t sure how much time passed, until they finally left the top deck of the tower. But he knew it was getting really late. Which was why he was kind of surprised, when they left the elevator and walked outside into a crowd of people. A bunch of couples were all standing around, like they were waiting for something.

Furihata and Akashi paused, to look up at the south side of the tower. The heart was still shining on the main deck. Far above it hovered the smaller top deck. The reminder of how high they had been made Furihata dizzy.

The night was colder than ever. Furihata could see his own breath, and Akashi’s. He didn’t know how Akashi felt, but he was kind of reluctant to leave. He kept looking back at the upper deck, and remembering everything that had happened there.

It already seemed like a dream. But then again, it usually did, to be dating Akashi Seijuurou. To be able to do so many amazing, impossible things, with someone who was even more amazing.

Furihata couldn’t help thinking that it would feel pretty brutal someday, to have to eventually wake up from something like that.

Suddenly, music was playing, as the lights on the tower began to go out. The couples around them were murmuring to each other. All at once, Furihata remembered what was going on.

“Oh, right,” he said. “They say that if you go to Tokyo Tower as a couple, and you see the lights go off, then you’ll always be happy together.”

Akashi looked startled. He seemed to have forgotten about the legend too, or maybe he hadn’t heard it before. He glanced up at the tower again, and his expression fell slightly. “Do they?”

His voice was low. Furihata could have sworn it was tinged with some kind of longing. He swallowed, as the huge heart on the tower flickered, and faded away. His hand had slipped into his coat pocket, where he put the box with the watch.

“Yeah, I think so,” he said, softly. Furihata had mentioned the story on impulse, just because he remembered it. He hadn’t really meant to imply anything else… Like that it was supposed to apply to the two of them.

They both watched in silence, as the last lights went out. The darkened tower loomed in the wintry night. The snow had stopped, but the sky was still veiled with heavy clouds. The couples around them were all trading happy, contented looks.

Furihata closed his eyes. He was thinking about a few things a certain person told him, about what might happen in the future. His intuition had been telling him for a while now that this person was right.

_“This is going to be very hard on him, Kouki-chan. You’ll both have to make some terribly difficult decisions, I’m afraid. But you can be there for him, if you choose to be.”_

Furihata didn’t make a wish, or anything like that. But he reached for Akashi’s hand, and held onto it firmly. And he made a promise to himself, not for the first time. He knew it wouldn’t be the last.

Furihata had decided he would always want to be there for Akashi, whatever that involved. In the end, their bond was priceless, to both of them. The longer they were together, the more Furihata realized just how true this was.

And he had a growing suspicion that, at least for him, nothing would be able to genuinely replace it.

Furihata didn’t know what would happen, in the next few years. Not for sure. In that moment, he found himself hoping that everything would work out somehow. Maybe he and Akashi could be together, in a way he couldn’t imagine yet. But no matter what, Furihata would do whatever he could to keep supporting Akashi. To be a true friend to him, and help him on the difficult road that awaited him, as the sole heir to his family’s empire. And besides…

On a night like this, anything seemed possible. Like snow in Tokyo on Christmas Eve, or a message in lights blazing across a series of skyscrapers.

Furihata smiled at Akashi, letting some of that hope show on his face. Akashi looked surprised, then unexpectedly comforted. They held onto each other’s hands, as tightly as they could, as they left the dark Tokyo Tower behind.

They walked together down the street, to where Akashi’s driver was waiting for them. And they treasured every moment they were having together, because they both knew just how valuable it was.

It was, after all, something that money could never buy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I hope my fellow AkaFuri fans out there enjoyed this, because I definitely enjoyed writing it. <3 (And if you want to check out the notes, they're over [here](http://courtingstars.tumblr.com/post/181478825182/notes-for-nothing-in-the-world-can-buy-akafuri).) As always, thank you so much for any kudos and/or comments! I've been slowly recovering from the holidays but I'm aiming to have the rest of the chapters up soon.
> 
> **Up Next:** Kise and Kasamatsu! (I can't believe I finally get to post a fic with them, YAY.)


	3. The Songs We Love to Sing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here’s the chapter with Kise and Kasamatsu! I honestly wasn’t expecting to find out that people were looking forward to this chapter—I ship them a lot, but I’ve never posted it on Ao3 before—so I hope it’s enjoyable to read. I definitely enjoyed writing it, for many reasons. <3
> 
> Today’s version of Sleigh Ride is [ the Pentatonix version](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UAwOiWWBNEI), because it seems like one that Kise would like. XD Enjoy!

Kise Ryouta didn’t have any plans for Christmas Eve. Which was totally fine by him.

But he probably should have known where he would end up, when it got late and everyone else was out being all mushy with each other.

“Seriously, senpai.” He shook his head. “I know you’re a starving college student. But how do you not even have _cocoa_?”

Kise said this like it was a staple. Because it was, at least in December. And how did his senpai not get that?

Kasamatsu was rummaging through the cabinets, beside the placemat-sized counter of his apartment kitchenette. He made that gruff noise in the back of his throat. The one that meant Kise had better get ready, because he was about to get told off.

“Okay first of all, Mr. Carefree High-Schooler, because cocoa isn’t _food_. It’s called having priorities, and a budget. I drink coffee most of the time anyway. And I wasn’t expecting guests tonight.” He shot Kise a pointed look, from around the wooden cabinet door.

Kise just grinned at him. “Aw, how lonely. Aren’t you glad I didn’t have plans?”

Kasamatsu stared at him for a long moment. He shook his head, and went back to searching. “I still can’t believe you showed up with the guys. If you do that again, I’ll cuff you. Straight up.”

Kise had to swallow a laugh.

“Ooh, so mean! I thought you were done being our oh-so-strict captain.” His tone was teasing. But he had to admit, that fact still made him a little wistful. Hayakawa had been a good captain, a super good one actually, and his successor was too. But Kise still missed Kasamatsu’s no-nonsense approach sometimes.

(Kasamatsu had told him once, that he didn’t need to call him senpai anymore… Kise had a feeling he would be calling him that for a while, though. Kasamatsu always seemed to be miles ahead of him, in all the ways that mattered.)

Kise wasn’t the only one who missed him, of course. Which was why it was easy, when he ended up hanging out with some of the old regulars of Kaijou’s basketball team on Christmas Eve, to convince them to show up at the store where Kasamatsu worked. Because yeah, sure, people didn’t usually get the holiday off work in Japan… But it still sucked to be working a long shift on a night when so many people were out having fun, right?

And okay, maybe it wasn’t the best idea in the universe. Kise’s former teammates had been rowdy as usual, pretending to shop and asking Kasamatsu a bunch of dumb questions while he tried to stock the shelves. After about thirty minutes of this, Kasamatsu was pretty obviously on the verge of losing it.

Which was when Kise batted his eyelashes at his supervisor and asked very, very nicely if Kasamatsu could leave a teensy bit early. Then they all went out for food. By the end of the meal, Kasamatsu seemed less pissed off at them. Especially when Kise insisted on paying.

“At this rate I’ll never be done.” Kasamatsu heaved a sigh. “Are those idiots ever going to grow up? I still can’t believe Moriyama has an actual girlfriend.”

“I know, right?” Kise giggled. “I didn’t think she was really real until she showed up after dinner. And she was pretty and everything!”

Kasamatsu snorted. “I’m just glad she seemed _normal_. I was starting to worry about where his standards were going.”

Kise resisted the urge to tease Kasamatsu about how parental he was sometimes. Because honestly, it went without saying at this point. (Even if he did say it, he knew all he would get in return was a muttered, “Shut up.”)

Kise wandered over to the porch door. Well, it wasn’t exactly a porch—more like a glorified window ledge you could look out over—but the glass sliding door let in lots of light during the day. He liked to visit in the afternoon, when the sun was spilling through the glass and warming up the whole apartment.

It was dark outside right now. But Kise still enjoyed the view, of apartment buildings crammed all together and the Tokyo light glowing off the clouds, in the slice of sky visible between the rooftops. Best of all, he could see stray white flakes fluttering down beneath a streetlamp.

“It’s so cool that it snowed,” he murmured. “How romantic is that? I mean it’s not sticking to the ground, but still.”

There was a pause, which Kise might have wondered about, if he hadn’t been too busy watching the snow fall.

“I hope they’re having fun out there,” he added, a little absently. Thinking about all his friends who were out tonight, wondering what they were doing right now.

A cabinet shut behind him. “What, you mean like Moriyama and the others?”

Kise knew without having to ask that Kasamatsu meant, _“The ones with dates.”_

“Yup,” he chirped. “Some of my other friends have dates too! They’re going to Disneyland, and—I’m not sure where else.”

He frowned. He had texted Akashicchi to ask again what his date plans were, but all he got back was a smiley face. (Specifically, this one: “(o‿∩)”.) And yes, Kise was very proud of his former middle school captain for trying to learn the amazing art of emoticons, but he was also really curious and mysterious winky faces _didn’t answer his question_.

“And I’m ninety-nine percent sure Midorimacchi is on a date!” he added. “Or with a date, anyway? But he’s acting like he doesn’t know.”

Kasamatsu glanced up from the coffee maker. His dark brows were bunched into a confused sort of grimace. Somewhere halfway between, _“What the hell do you mean?”_ and, _“I don’t think I want to know either.”_ Which was pretty standard, whenever Kise told him what the Generation of Miracles were up to.

“It’s still weird to me that any of your friends are dating,” was what he said instead.

Kise chuckled. “Really? I don’t think it’s that weird. They’re a bunch of hopeless romantics, to be honest.”

Kasamatsu gave him a disbelieving look, but Kise just shrugged.

“Well, some of them,” he added. “Anyway, I’m just happy for them, you know?”

He smiled at Kasamatsu. It was nice, how he could tell his senpai about his friends without worrying he would get all judgmental. Kasamatsu knew that some of his friends were dating other boys—and he knew that Kise was more into guys than girls. He didn’t bring it up much, but he never brought up dating much in general.

Kasamatsu nodded. He set out two blue coffee mugs, side by side. He leaned against the cabinet, while the coffee maker bubbled away.

“So, what about you?” He eyed Kise. “You’re pretty into that all romance stuff yourself. I figured you’d be going out tonight.”

“Nah.” Kise was cheerful. “I don’t have anyone like that. And I’m not really looking.”

Kasamatsu looked surprised. “You don’t want a girlfriend? Or a… boyfriend?”

Kise just shrugged again. He didn’t know how to explain. He’d gone on a few dates over the past year, but it was oddly boring. He liked the kissing parts, and the flirting, but that was pretty much it.

He _was_ interested in romance, when other people were doing it. But it just didn’t seem to click for him, somehow.

“I guess I’m just busy with other stuff,” he said finally. He cocked his head, and a smile twitched at the edges of his mouth. “What about you, senpai? I keep thinking you’ll get a girlfriend pretty soon.”

Kasamatsu started. “Why in the hell would you think _that_?”

He started fumbling with the cabinets again. He already looked kind of red. Kise couldn’t help but laugh.

“You’re so shy! Can’t fool me though. I bet you’re more romantic than anybody. And you’ll find an amazing girl and marry her and have lots of kids and be a super duper great dad and—”

“Where are you even coming up with all this crap?!” Kasamatsu sputtered. He paused for a second. “And… I don’t know. About that.”

His tone of voice had changed. It pricked Kise’s ears in a strange way. He came closer, as Kasamatsu shut the cabinet door. “Huh? Why not?”

Kasamatsu gazed at him. He looked really serious. For a split second—a stupid, out-of-his-mind second—Kise almost thought Kasamatsu was going to say that he liked boys, or maybe even liked _him_. He had wondered a few times if that could be true. Out of curiosity, more than anything.

But it was kind of weird… Kise was pretty sure that his senpai knew he could tell him, if he was into guys. They had been friends for almost three years now, and he never said anything about it. Plus he was always nervous and blushing around girls. So Kise figured he probably liked them, at least some of the time.

Kasamatsu’s brows were furrowed, forming a bunch of little lines. He opened his mouth—then shut it, and broke their eye contact.

“Guess I’m just busy too,” he said finally. “Not sure I’m the marrying type, anyway.”

Kise tried not to frown. He couldn’t help thinking that Kasamatsu seemed _exactly_ like the marrying type. To him, at least. But it wasn’t like it was his place to argue, if that was how his senpai really felt.

“Oh, okay,” was all he said out loud. “Well, maybe we’ll both be a couple of lifelong bachelors, then. Who knows, right?”

“Yeah, who knows,” Kasamatsu said. He looked kind of troubled, though.

Some part of Kise wondered if he should ask again, what his senpai was actually thinking. If that was what a good friend was supposed to do… In all honesty, he had never been great at that stuff. It was kind of amazing to him, that he had as many friends as he did. Especially the close ones.

He didn’t have them because he was good at starting super-serious talks, that was for sure.

So instead, Kise did something he _was_ good at. Which was changing the subject, to something fun.

“Ooh, so what about music?” He bounded over to the cabinet that held his senpai’s record collection. “We should definitely put on a Christmas one.”

He rummaged through the record jackets, to see what he could find. He used to think it was kind of weird, that Kasamatsu actually bought old vinyl records. Like, what was the point when there was digital music? But it had grown on Kise, over the last year or so. Now he almost always put a record on when he visited.

Kasamatsu was rolling his eyes, as he turned back to the coffee maker. “I don't have anything like that.”

“What do you mean?” Kise popped his head up. “Wait, are you saying you don’t have _any_ Christmas albums? Not even one?”

His mouth hung open, as he was gripped by an increasing sense of dismay.

“Why would I?” Kasamatsu blinked at him. “We never did anything for Christmas at my house. Just New Year’s.”

“But—but—” Kise knew not everyone in Japan celebrated Christmas, obviously. His own family stopped bothering with gifts, as soon as Kise and his sisters weren’t little anymore. (And his family loved excuses to buy stuff.) But that wasn’t the point. “What about all the decorations and the music and everything? It’s so fun!”

Kasamatsu gave a shrug. Kise was aghast.

“I don’t believe this,” he declared. “My most wonderfulest senpai ever doesn’t like Christmas. He is a Scrooge. Or a Grinch.”

Kasamatsu laughed. So he got the references, at least.

“It’s no big deal.” He started pouring the freshly made coffee into the mugs. “I just think it’s corny. And expensive. And it’s mostly for couples anyway.”

“Ugh. You really are a Scrooge.” Kise shook his head, as he turned back to the albums. “Don’t you at least have a cover of Last Christmas or something?”

This time, Kasamatsu made an audible gagging sound. “Yeah, no. No thanks.”

Kise let out an exaggerated sigh. He should have figured. Kasamatsu wasn’t a fan of “overproduced” pop. Or cutesy love songs, either. Which was too bad, because Kise loved that song. All the stores in Japan played it constantly during December. That, and "All I Want For Christmas" by Mariah Carey—which Kise also loved.

“Well, there are bunches of good Christmas songs that are older.” He kept thumbing through the records, even though he knew he wouldn’t find any seasonal ones. “Like the ones about bells, and sleigh rides, and chestnuts and stuff. Oh, and Santa.”

While he was talking, Kasamatsu was doing something at the counter that involved a lot of clinking. “Yeah, I know some. The melodies, anyway.”

He brought the two mugs over to where Kise stood. Kise eagerly took one, and was surprised when he noticed that they were both prepared like lattes. Normally, Kasamatsu only drank his coffee black—and scoffed at Kise, for all his fancy coffee drinks that were “basically milkshakes.”

Kise took a small sip, trying to make sure not to burn his tongue. His eyes widened. “Is this a mocha, senpai? I didn’t know you made these!”

“I had chocolate syrup.” Kasamatsu shrugged. “I figured it’d be closer to cocoa.”

“Aww. You’re so sweet.” Kise grinned as he said it, because he knew it would annoy him. “Did you make one for yourself, too?” Before Kasamatsu could answer, he added, “Are you feeling okay?”

“Ha, ha.” Kasamatsu gave him a look. “Now drink your liquid candy bar or whatever.”

“Yes, sir.” Kise gladly did. It really was good, for something so simple. Creamy, and sweet, but not too much.

They sat on the floor together, next to the porch window. Kasamatsu had only one comfy chair in his apartment. He was still hunting for a cheap couch that was small enough for the place. He always told Kise he could sit in the chair. But that didn’t seem as friendly to Kise as sitting side by side, so he always chose the floor too.

He had grown to like it, a lot. Just sitting with his back to the wall, next to his senpai, while they looked out the porch window. The space heater was going, and the room was nice and toasty. They sipped their coffee, and watched the snowflakes fluttering outside.

And Kise didn’t really mean to, but he started humming.

He felt Kasamatsu shift beside him, like he was listening. Kise hummed the chorus, trying to remember exactly how the song went. After a moment, Kasamatsu got up, and took his guitar from its stand in the corner. He sat back down next to Kise. Pretty soon, he was strumming out an arrangement of “White Christmas,” matching it easily to Kise’s pace.

Kise couldn’t stop a smile. He sang the next verse, murmuring the words he could remember, and hummed the ones he didn’t. (It was harder to remember songs in English. He was pretty good at mimicking the sounds, though.)

They had done this before. More and more, actually, over time. Kise had always liked karaoke, but singing along with Kasamatsu’s guitar was different. It was just the two of them, so there was no point in being goofy, or trying to impress anyone. He didn’t need to be loud enough, or try to stay on key.

He could just… sing.

Kise gazed up at the ceiling, and the apartment around him. He watched his senpai, too, and the practiced way he played. Kasamatsu strummed the guitar with strong, sure fingers. It was the same way he did everything.

Sometimes, Kise wondered why he kept coming to Kasamatsu’s apartment like this, two whole years after they played on a basketball team together. More than that, he wondered why Kasamatsu always let him.

It wasn’t like that, at first. When Kasamatsu left for college, Kise called him, like, all the time. Kasamatsu put up with it for the most part, and only hung up on him every fourth phone call or so. (Which was a pretty great track record, compared to some of Kise’s friends.) But it still seemed to annoy him.

Then when Kasamatsu got an apartment, Kise kept showing up uninvited. Because yeah, he was obnoxious like that. Kasamatsu would usually let him hang out for an hour, as long as he didn’t have work or classes. But he always said, “Call next time, idiot. Some of us actually study. You should try it.”

Something changed, in the summer of Kise’s second year. It was around the time that Kise and the rest of the Generation of Miracles beat Jabberwock. Kasamatsu stopped scolding him for coming over. He let Kise stay as long as he wanted, and never once ordered him to leave, the way he used to.

And Kise wasn’t sure if it was Kasamatsu who had changed, or him. Or both.

He glanced at his senpai. Kasamatsu had his steady gaze fixed on the guitar, as his hands glided back and forth. His firm features wore a look of concentration, but his posture was relaxed. There was a certain softness in his light blue eyes that Kise only noticed in moments like this.

And Kise got that weird feeling again. The warm one that seemed to well up inside his chest and spill out all over the place, whenever he and Kasamatsu were alone.

It was weird, because Kise really didn’t know what it meant… He knew his senpai was handsome. Not in a pretty way, but a solid, masculine one. Kise had noticed from the beginning, and he only felt that way more and more, the longer they knew each other. But Kise already knew how it felt, to think a guy was good-looking. To be attracted to him.

This feeling was something else, something different. To the point that he kind of felt like the attraction part of it wasn’t important at all.

They finished the song, and the last chords of the guitar faded. Before Kise could really think about it, he started singing another song. “I’ll Be Home For Christmas,” this time. Because now that they had started, he didn’t want to stop. He could stay like this all night long, and be completely happy.

Longer, maybe. He wouldn’t mind doing it every day.

He leaned over, slouching a little, until he was resting his head on Kasamatsu’s shoulder. He closed his eyes as he sang, and listened to the guitar. Somewhere beneath the gently humming strings, he caught a low mumble. His smile widened. Kasamatsu never sang loud enough to be heard when he played. But every once in a while, Kise would notice that he was singing too, under his breath.

Kise snuggled up even closer. Kasamatsu didn’t flinch, or seem uncomfortable at all. Kise didn’t know why this made him so happy.

The thing was, he really did look up to Kasamatsu. He honestly admired him, a lot. And it wasn’t something he was used to feeling.

Kasamatsu was just so, well, _mature_. He had his own apartment, which he kept super clean, and he was working and keeping up his grades at the same time. Oh, yeah, and he still played basketball too. But he never seemed freaked out about his workload. Kise didn’t know how he did it.

Normally, Kise didn’t notice this kind of stuff about other people. To be one hundred percent honest, he never used to think it was all that important to be responsible. Until he met Kasamatsu, and realized just how hard it was. He was sure he couldn’t do it himself.

He couldn’t believe he was graduating soon… To be honest, Kise still had no idea what he was doing. He wasn’t going to a university, because uh, _no thanks_. He stuck it out for high school, but there was no way he was going to any more boring classes.

Plus, the people at his modeling agency kept nagging him to take more jobs. So he was starting with that, for now. They all seemed weirdly excited, and kept saying he could be super mega famous. But they said that to all their models, pretty much. Still, Kise figured it wasn’t a bad idea to try to get as much work as he could, since he was young and stuff. As for basketball…

He didn’t know what to do about that.

Kise wanted to play, and there were options, but… They all seemed sort of weird? A bunch of pro Japanese teams had offered to take him on, straight out of high school. That was what Aominecchi was doing. He was trying to get to the NBA, eventually.

But the other members of the Generation of Miracles were starting with university basketball. And Kagamicchi, was doing that too, over in America. He would be in the NBA someday, for sure. Kise didn’t know about anyone else, though.

Maybe that should have been enough, for him to go for it. But when he thought about playing in such a high-pressure league in America, with Kagamicchi and maybe Aominecchi, and maybe some of the others but also maybe not…

It made him feel kind of… not great. And Kise didn’t want to think about why.

Anyway, it seemed fine to focus on modeling for a couple years, for now. The pro teams said they would still take him later. That way, Kise could hang out with most of his friends, while they were going to school in Tokyo.

He could keep spending time with Kasamatsu, too. At least, Kise hoped he could. Everything seemed so much simpler, in this warm little apartment.

He nestled closer to Kasamatsu. He noticed a familiar oceany scent, of a body wash he gave his senpai once. It was free promo stuff, that Kise wasn’t going to use. Plus he had a feeling it would smell great on Kasamatsu. Which it did. Kise smiled as he breathed it in. It kind of reminded him of all those times they went to the beach, with the rest of Kaijou’s team.

They had switched to the funny song about Rudolph the reindeer, and Kise’s thoughts were wandering. He couldn’t figure out how it worked, to have a nose that was basically a light bulb. Then he was thinking about Christmas lights, and how cool they were, and how he saw some with his friends the other day, and…

“Oh my god.” He shot into an upright position. “I forgot.”

Kasamatsu stopped playing. He was staring at him. “What?”

“I can’t believe it! I totally spaced.” Kise let his voice sharpen into a whine. “Ugh, I’m so dumb. And it would have been perfect right now, too!”

“What in the hell are you talking about?” Kasamatsu was frowning in that way he did sometimes, like he didn’t know whether to be concerned or annoyed.

“Your surprise!” Kise pouted at him. “I forgot all about it. I’ve got it in my bag and everything. The guys are gonna be so pissed at me.”

Kasamatsu’s frown only deepened. “Wait, what do they have to do with this?”

“They helped me pick it out!” Kise threw up his hands. He seriously couldn’t even. “At the store, when you weren’t looking. And I was supposed to try to get you out of the room. But whatever. I’m gonna do it anyway.”

He scrambled to his feet, then held out a hand to Kasamatsu. His senpai just gave him a confused look. Which wasn’t helping anything.

Because Kise had work to do, dammit. It was Christmas, after all.

“You have to go into your room,” he explained. “Okay? And you can’t come out until I’m done. It’s super important!”

“What? But—”

Kise ignored him, and hauled him to his feet. (Which wasn’t actually that hard, even with the guitar.) He pulled Kasamatsu over to his bedroom, which was basically the size of a closet.

“Kise, this is ridiculous,” Kasamatsu said, while Kise shoved him into the tiny space. “What the hell’s gotten into you?”

“I told you, it’s important! I’m gonna get you into the Christmas spirit, and that’s that. And no peeking!”

With that, Kise shut the door on his senpai. An aggravated groan came from inside the bedroom, but he didn’t acknowledge it. He turned back to the center of the apartment, and inspected the mostly blank walls, trying to decide where to start.

Yup, he was so doing this.

* * *

Kasamatsu Yukio was about ninety-nine percent sure that his apartment was getting destroyed.

Okay, that was being dramatic. (It sounded more like what Kise would say, come to think of it.) Still, Kasamatsu was getting increasingly convinced that something out there was getting trashed. Or at least semi-damaged. If he was lucky.

At first, this whole ordeal seemed harmless. It mostly sounded like Kise was opening a few packages out there. But as the minutes ticked by, a series of thuds started to echo across the room. Then Kise’s bubbly voice kept saying, “Oops,” and “Whoopsie,” which eventually turned into swearing. Also, something kept scraping against the walls.

So that was great. Kasamatsu just hoped to god his neighbors weren’t home.

He still didn’t get what this was all about in the first place. It was Christmas Eve, not his birthday or anything. What was the point of surprising him, with whatever it was? Most people in Japan only bothered with crap like this if they were dating.

He and Kise definitely weren’t dating.

Kasamatsu was trying to read one of his textbooks, because there was nothing else to do in his bedroom. (It wasn’t even the textbook he would have picked, right now.) But he couldn’t concentrate. He tried yelling at Kise a few times, to ask if he could come out. To help, or something. Kise kept saying no, because of course he did.

There was another thud, louder this time. Kasamatsu growled, losing his patience. He stood and moved to the door. “Seriously, Kise, what’re you—”

He was interrupted by an ear-piercing clatter, then a startled yip. At least Kise didn’t sound hurt. Kasamatsu gritted his teeth. He swore to god, if he ended up not being able to get his deposit on this apartment back someday…

“That’s it, I’m coming out.” He flung the door open. He was fully prepared to be met with some form of disaster zone, that would need professional repairs and get him on bad terms with the landlord.

So it was a relief when he saw that the loud noise was just because the metal curtain rod had fallen out of its brackets.

There was Kise beside the porch window, apparently torn between freaking out about the curtain rod, and pouting because Kasamatsu came out of his room. He was lugging around a big tangle of plastic cords, and it took Kasamatsu a second to realize they were string lights. What he couldn’t figure out, was how Kise had gotten the lights tangled around his legs, and part of the rod, and an end table.

“Senpai!” Kise whined. “You weren’t supposed to see.”

“See what? You making a mess?” Kasamatsu sighed, at the wounded look on Kise’s face. He knew him enough to know it was semi-genuine, but also not a big deal. Which was the whole paradox of interacting with Kise in general. “Look, just let me help. It’ll be easier on both of us, all right? I won’t die from stress, and you won’t die from me throttling you. Everybody wins.”

It was an empty threat, and they both knew it. Kasamatsu couldn’t remember the last time he tried to corral Kise by getting physical with him. Maybe he was just all bark now, and his way of dealing with people had changed too much. Or maybe it was because Kise didn’t need to be corralled anymore.

He had a feeling it was both, actually.

Kise stuck his lower lip out even farther. “Fine. But you’re a total surprise ruiner.”

“Guilty.” Kasamatsu came over to the window, to inspect the curtain rod. It was pretty flimsy, and hadn’t scuffed the floors, so that was good.

He had Kise help him put the rod back in place. Then he started untangling the strings of lights, one by one. Kise explained that he was trying to hang them on the wall with adhesive hooks, but they weren’t staying up for some reason. (Which explained all the scraping noises earlier.) After that, he tried hanging them from the curtain rod instead. Kasamatsu was surprised, and definitely grateful, that Kise had put that much thought into how to avoid damaging the walls.

He asked if it was part of Kise’s plan to tie all the lights up in a knotted ball, too. He got a stuck-out tongue for that one. Which was fair.

They worked together for a while, to get the lights straightened out. Kasamatsu told Kise they could just use masking tape to hold the lights up, since it was temporary. He helped Kise tape the lights in place, on the wall beside the porch. They also hung one cord to the curtain rod, that had multiple strands of lights hanging down.

Kise started singing again, while they were doing it. He kept switching from song to song, and every single one was about Christmas. Kasamatsu didn’t even recognize some of them. He was decent at memorizing songs, but Kise was such a natural at mimicking that he seemed to do it without any effort.

Kasamatsu did correct him a few times when his English was way off, though. A diligent language student, Kise wasn’t. (Not that Kasamatsu was great at it either.)

It was kind of funny, how hyped Kise was. Kasamatsu still didn’t get what the big deal was about Christmas. But at the same time, he felt like he understood why Kise liked it. It just seemed like the sort of cheesy, frilly, lighthearted stuff he was into.

Kise was getting excited again, once they were ready to plug in everything. So Kasamatsu let him do the honors.

The bulbs sparked to life, in a brilliant wave of blue. For some reason, Kasamatsu hadn’t really paid attention to the fact that the lights were all the same color—and not the usual white kind, either. Now one whole side of his apartment was glowing with deep blue light.

It looked cool, actually. And not just in the literal sense. He wasn’t sure if it reminded him more of water, or stars.

“Didn’t know you were such a huge blue fan,” was what he said to Kise.

“Well, yeah. Of course!” Kise was beaming, admiring their handiwork. “It reminds me of our team, you know?”

Kasamatsu raised his brows. Now it made sense. Especially when Kise said their other former teammates helped him pick out the lights. Kasamatsu hadn’t even noticed any of the guys looking in the seasonal decor section… Probably because one of them was trying to annoy him on purpose, as a distraction.

He laughed a little, under his breath. That just figured.

Kise was still gazing at the lights. The watery glow was shining on his face, and in his eyes. There was enough normal lighting in the room to see the yellow hue of his hair, as it blended together with the blue. The effect was sort of mesmerizing.

Kise always looked weirdly bright to begin with. Like a beam of sunshine personified. And in the right lighting, he could be damn near incandescent.

Usually, Kasamatsu never noticed that kind of thing. It was just that with someone like Kise, it was impossible to ignore.

He frowned. He walked over to the coffee maker, trying not to overthink it.

“More coffee?” he said, as he poured himself another cup. Kise flashed him that billion-watt smile, that easily outshone all the bulbs.

“Yeah, sure.” He giggled. “Even though it’s like, ten. Are you trying to make sure I can’t sleep tonight?”

It was weird, Kasamatsu thought. He knew a lot of people would turn that last part into some kind of dirty joke. In fact, he could swear he had heard Kise say it that way before… He had definitely heard Kise say other stuff along those lines. So he knew what Kise’s “I’m talking about _sex_ ” voice sounded like.

Whenever they were hanging out alone, Kise never did that. Everything he said always sounded normal. No double meaning behind it at all.

Kasamatsu wasn’t sure why that was, exactly. But god, he appreciated it.

He handed Kise his refilled mug. They then sat together on the floor, sipping coffee and looking up at the lights. Kise wasn’t chattering that much. Which was weird, obviously, for him. But he didn’t seem upset or anything. Just… content. He got like that sometimes, when he was visiting Kasamatsu.

It was like Kise felt free to be quiet when they were alone, if he wanted. He didn’t need to fill up every pause. Kasamatsu was glad he felt that way. For one thing, the occasional silence was nice. Kise’s constant talking could be dizzying.

But it was also because Kise seemed comfortable, and relaxed. And for whatever reason, Kasamatsu wanted that.

So he didn’t flinch, or even bristle at all, when Kise randomly decided to lie down and rest his head in his lap. With anybody else, Kasamatsu would have balked. But with Kise, it felt normal, somehow. He was just a touchy kind of person. And Kasamatsu didn’t mind.

Maybe that last part was still weird, come to think of it.

All the touchy stuff used to annoy him, at least sometimes. Just like the way Kise would constantly call, and text, and show up at his apartment uninvited. It was fine, because they were friends. But it was still kind of like babysitting an overgrown kid.

Until it wasn’t anymore.

Kasamatsu didn’t know when he had started to think of Kise differently. It probably started when they were playing basketball together. He didn’t really ponder it at the time. But then came the summer when the whole Jabberwock thing went down. When he told Kise to win, and why.

Kise went all out that day, and sacrificed himself so the Vorpal Swords could win. And Kasamatsu wasn’t surprised, at all.

Kise’s abilities were incredible from the start. He was a good guy too, no matter what he said about himself, and how immature he could be. Kasamatsu had known it already, on some level.

But it was more than that. Way more. And now Kasamatsu could never forget what kind of person Kise really was. It was staring him in the face, all the time.

He looked down at Kise, whose eyes were half-closed. He was stared dreamily at the lights above them, and his silky hair was falling across his forehead. Kasamatsu knew what most people saw, when they looked at Kise. It was impossible not to. “Good looking” wasn’t even the right word. More like gorgeous. Even that seemed like some weird understatement, though.

Whatever the word was, for being beautiful on a superhuman level.

Kasamatsu knew how bad it had to be, if even he noticed. Every angle and curve of Kise’s face seemed like it had been drawn by an artist, one who got too carried away. Because he barely even looked like a real person. His eyes were too bright, and his lashes were too long and dark, even when he didn’t have his eye makeup on. His skin was flawless. Even his damn lips were perfect. Kasamatsu wouldn’t have known what perfect lips were, if anyone asked. Except now he did, because Kise had them.

It was ridiculous, honestly. Kasamatsu had been waiting for the train the other day, near some gigantic ad posted on the wall. It took him a full five seconds to realize that he was staring at Kise, because the face in the ad looked like some mathematically perfected version of a human. Except oh wait, he’d seen that mathematically perfect face before, a whole bunch of times, smiling in his apartment. Just without the dramatic lighting, and the photo editing to draw careful attention to every impossibly pretty feature.

And while Kasamatsu was standing there, he swore he heard like five or six separate women whispering to each other, “Who is that?”

And he kept thinking, _“He’s this guy I know, who’s kind of a goofy idiot, but yeah, he does look like that. And also, weirdly, he’s a genuinely great person.”_

The truth was, Kasamatsu didn’t know what it meant, that he had noticed the whole beautiful thing. He was pretty sure that with Kise, it was unavoidable. Some part of him was starting to wonder if it meant that he found Kise attractive, on a personal level. But he had no idea how to answer that question.

He did know that it didn’t really matter to him, though. Not compared to the fact that he thought Kise was a truly admirable guy. How even with all his amazing talents, he genuinely cared about people, and he cared about the things that were important.

Kasamatsu didn’t know why he did it. But while he was sitting there, with Kise stretched out across his apartment floor, he started running his fingers through that soft golden hair, stroking each strand into place. Kise shut his eyes, going almost limp at the contact. So Kasamatsu kept doing it.

It probably should have felt weird. Like he was petting some kind of human-puppy hybrid, which was how Kise acted a lot of the time.

But it wasn’t like that. At all. Even though he wasn’t sure what it was like instead.

Kasamatsu didn’t know how much time passed, until Kise opened his eyes again. Then they were just sort of looking at each other. The glow from the lights shone above them, and Kise’s doe-like eyes were sparkling, yellow irises mixed with glimmers of blue. Neither of them moved.

It was like they weren’t completely sure, what they were supposed to be doing.

Before either of them could figure it out, Kise’s phone blinked on the floor beside them. The screen showed a bunch of notifications. (It seemed like Kise’s phone always had a billion notifications, about who-knew-what.) Kise reached for it, and quickly scanned the messages. He smiled.

“Aww.” His eyes were like molten gold now, in the light of the screen. “Akashicchi finally sent me pictures.”

He showed Kasamatsu a photo, of what looked like a half-eaten toy train. (Some kind of cake, he hoped.) A sweeping view of Tokyo gleamed in the background. The whole thing looked like some over-the-top magazine photo of a Christmas Eve date. Which wasn’t exactly surprising, considering the source.

Kise was scrolling through more pictures, and his expression softened even more.

“Yup, that’s what it’s about,” he murmured, almost like it was to himself. “Ooh, and that hat is amazing. Go me.”

Sure enough, Kasamatsu was starting to get lost, like he usually did when it came to Kise’s social life. “You had your friends send you photos of their dates?” Sometimes he couldn’t figure out if Kise was just too extroverted for his own good, or if his romantic streak was out of control. Maybe both.

“Nah, I just wanted to know what they were up to. But it’s faster to send photos, I guess.” Kise grinned. “Plus I was seriously nagging Akashicchi earlier. He was being way too mysterious.”

He sat up, while he started scanning his messages again. And Kasamatsu couldn't figure out why he kind of wished Kise had stayed where he was.

“He’s not the only one who did, though,” Kise was adding. “I got the world’s most adorable pic of Kagamicchi in Tigger ears. Cutest blackmail ever. I totally sent it to everybody.”

All of a sudden, Kasamatsu felt weirdly sorry for Kagami Taiga. (And not for the first time, either.) Even if that wasn’t how blackmail was supposed to work.

“Oh, and Murasakibaracchi was asking me about taste in jewelry. So I’m pretty sure the world is ending,” Kise added. “But I helped. At least I think I did?”

“Wait, what? You mean like, for a gift?” Now Kasamatsu was lost completely. It seemed like it was just a given, at this point, when Kise tried to tell him about his friends from the Generation of Miracles. “I thought you said he wasn’t dating anybody.”

“He’s not! God, no. No way. I’m pretty sure he doesn’t care about all of that.” Kise was tapping the screen. “But that reminds me, I should probably ask Aominecchi how his thing went. Hope he didn’t screw it up.”

And there was somebody else who Kasamatsu was ninety-nine percent sure wasn’t dating. According to Kise’s constant gossip, at least. So he had no clue what Aomine Daiki had to do with any of this, or what “his thing” was supposed to be.

Suddenly, Kise let out a surprised chirp. “Ooh, Takao texted me back! Okay, okay, hold on. I gotta see this.”

“Takao?” Kasamatsu repeated. “Since when do you even talk to that guy?”

“I don’t really, not much. But Midorimacchi wasn’t answering so I thought maybe Takao would tell me what they’re gonna do tonight, because I bet Midorimacchi doesn’t even know, and—”

He stopped, staring down at his phone. Then he abruptly snorted, and toppled over sideways, until he was a twitching, yellow-haired heap on the floor.

“Takao is my new favorite person,” he declared, before dissolving into another fit of giggles. “Oh my god! It’s too perfect. Just, yes. Get some.”

And Kasamatsu really didn’t want to ask, but for some reason, he did anyway. “What the hell are you going on about?”

Kise showed him, and Kasamatsu sort of recognized the main thing in the photo. But he didn’t get what it had to do, in any way, with “getting some.” Or what the weird caption meant, either: _“Shin-chan Trap, Patent Pending.”_

But if Kise was actually right, he didn’t want to know. Like seriously, zero interest.

Kise seemed interested, though. At least if the way he was still tittering with glee was any indication. And Kasamatsu found himself wondering, yet again, why his former teammate who was too good-looking for his own good still wasn’t dating anybody.

It just seemed weird, for multiple reasons. It wasn’t like Kise didn’t have a million people lusting after him. Kasamatsu could still barely comprehend the way girls flocked around him in literal droves. Sure, Kise didn’t seem as into girls as he was into guys… But guys ogled him, too. Openly enough that even Kasamatsu noticed.

Kise could have all the dates he wanted. And he was clearly into romantic stuff. Didn’t he want that for himself, too?

Maybe he was just taking his time. Which seemed weirdly mature of him, but… He was like that sometimes, when Kasamatsu least expected it.

Kasamatsu, meanwhile, had no idea what in the hell he wanted in that department. To be honest, he had kind of given up.

He forced himself to go on a total of one date, a year ago. And it was awful. Well, no, it wasn’t—which was the problem. He met a girl through friends at school, and she was pretty and nice and friendly and all the right things. He was nervous as hell, but he figured he would just force his way through it. There was no reason he had to be as painfully awkward as he was in high school.

And the date was fine. Maybe good, even, not that he knew. They had some nice, normal conversations, and she didn’t seem to care that he was too on edge to hold her hand or anything. But all he could think about was how if they kept going on dates like this, he was going to have to do the hand thing eventually. And kissing, too. And more than that, at some point. Because he was in his fucking twenties, and that was what you did, if you were dating somebody. Right?

Except… He didn’t actually want to. And Kasamatsu didn’t know if he was just scared, or what. He used to think he would get over it, if it was a shyness thing. But he was getting to the point where he didn’t even know anymore, if he liked girls, or guys, or humans, or no one.

He never heard from the girl afterward. She was probably expecting him to follow up, but maybe she had noticed, too… That there was no “chemistry” there. Whatever the hell that meant.

Anyway, it was just easier not to bother for now, and focus on school and work. It was a relief, actually. Which probably meant something, all by itself.

Kasamatsu didn’t know how to explain any of this, though. Especially not to a person like Kise, who seemed plugged into that whole realm of experiences, in a way Kasamatsu just… wasn’t. The sex part in particular.

Weirdly, Kise had never poked fun at him for it. Never called him sheltered, or urged him to not be so uptight. Even when he was probably tempted to do it, because yeah, Kasamatsu was kind of old-fashioned about some stuff.

Kasamatsu had wondered now and then, if it was possible Kise was interested in him that way… He didn’t seem to be, though. He never flirted, at least not the obvious kind of flirting, and he never tried to make any type of move. Which was also a relief, a huge one. Kasamatsu didn’t know what he would have done, if that happened.

Kise was taking pictures of the lights on the wall. “Almost forgot. Gotta preserve this for posterity.”

_“And send it to my million friends, and then post it to Instagram,”_ Kasamatsu assumed was the subtext. Weirdly, though, Kise didn’t seem to send the picture anywhere. He just set his phone aside.

“Pretty great, though, huh?” He was smirking at Kasamatsu. “Maybe this Christmas stuff isn’t so bad after all.”

Kasamatsu didn’t bother resisting the urge to roll his eyes. Since Kise was obviously in a teasing mood again. “It’s all right. Gonna be a huge hassle to take down, though.”

Kise pursed his lips in a cutesy frown. “Now don’t be like that, senpai, or I’m going to have to sing the Grinch song again.”

“God, don’t. That was terrible.”

“Oh, your English isn’t that great either!” Kise huffed, but his eyes were twinkling.

“It doesn’t have to be to know you don’t even sound  _close_ ,” Kasamatsu said, bracing himself, and sure enough Kise gave him a playful shove. Pretty soon they were both pushing at each other, until Kise was sprawled across the floor. And Kasamatsu reached over and mussed up his hair, and Kise squealed in mock-outrage. Which was somehow genuinely funny, and Kasamatsu had no idea why. Kise was laughing, too.

And there was never a moment where it felt weird, or awkward. Or like anything was going to happen, that Kasamatsu didn’t want.

He went to get his guitar afterward. The two of them sat against the lit-up wall again, and Kasamatsu played a few more corny Christmas songs, while Kise sang. (It was too late to be doing it, but they tried to be as quiet as they could.) They did one about Santa, and one about sleigh rides.

_“We’ll be singing the songs we love to sing, without a single stop…”_

Kasamatsu mouthed some of the words, but he was mostly listening. Kise was far from an expert singer. He wasn’t always on key, and his range wasn’t amazing. But there was something about his voice that was oddly nice to listen to. It was cheerful, in a brassy sort of way.

‘Merry and bright,’ Kasamatsu thought with a chuckle. It was a pretty accurate description, of Kise in general.

The chords of the last song faded, and Kise was leaning on him again. Kasamatsu wasn’t sure how that was comfortable, when Kise was so much taller, but he didn’t mind. They sat in friendly silence. Kise seemed lost in thought.

“Hey, senpai?” His voice was unusually soft. “I can keep coming here, right? Even after I graduate and everything?”

Kasamatsu glanced over, at the top of that bright yellow head. He couldn’t see most of Kise’s face, but his eyes looked downcast. Kasamatsu’s heart gave an odd twist.

He had kind of suspected it, for a while. That Kise was having a hard time deciding what to do with the future. He had a few guesses why—and honestly, he might have struggled too, in Kise’s position.

Maybe it was more than that, though. Maybe he was afraid, of losing what he had.

Kasamatsu set his guitar aside, and put his arm around Kise. He looked up at the lights, that were dyeing the wall that certain shade of blue.

“Yeah,” he said. “You can always come here.”

And he meant it. He pulled Kise in closer, to show him he was right there, and it was going to stay that way. Because he wanted that.

When Kasamatsu pictured Kise visiting him over the next few years, and even afterward… He was fine with it. Even if it was at random hours, even if he had no clue what Kise had been up to. He hoped Kise would, actually. He would probably look forward to it, and miss that sunny face, if Kise got too busy to show up all the time.

Kasamatsu didn’t know what that meant, really, or what it made their relationship. If they were friends, or something else. But the nice thing was, he didn’t feel like he needed to worry about it. He wasn’t sure that it mattered, for now. They both seemed happy with the way things were between them.

What he did know, was that he wanted Kise around. Because this guy had grown on him, strangely lovable weirdo that he was. Kasamatsu was honestly glad, and even grateful, that he had met someone like Kise Ryouta.

And when they were together, they made pretty good music, too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I didn’t write any cultural notes this time, but if you’d like to read some quick notes about the music in this chapter as well as their canon hobbies and my sexuality headcanons, they’re over [on my Tumblr](http://courtingstars.tumblr.com/post/181571437157/notes-for-the-songs-we-love-to-sing-kikasa) as usual.
> 
> **Next Up:** Either MuraHimu or AoMomo! And I apologize for the indecision on that… I’m just not sure which will get finished first? Either way, the other one will come right after it! (And this fic ends with MidoTaka. Because of course it does. XD)


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